Pic from flickr.
March 31, 2009
Posted by maru at 3/31/2009 11:10:00 PM
Headline of day, not from Fark or the Onion:
BREAKING: NY-20: Tedisco Preps for Loss, Files Motion to Overturn Election Results Before Polls Even Close
Realizing they couldn't steal it, the anal and hemorrhoidal byproduct of a political party known as Rushpublibots, while emulating Norm Coleman, have added a new play to their playbook. Or is that Goldman? It depends.
More coming soon, to an election near you!
Posted by Undeniable Liberal at 3/31/2009 06:28:00 PM
While appearing at a rally opposing The Employee Free Choice Act, non-union and unlicensed shit unclogger, "exemplary blue-collar working man" Joe Wurzelbacher faces booing, catcalls and is rightfully labelled Joe the imposter by REAL exemplary blue-collar working plumbers.
Karma certainly is a bitch, isn't it?
Posted by Undeniable Liberal at 3/31/2009 06:12:00 PM
Bwah!! It appears that most non deluded, independently thinking people aren't buying the Wingnut Bullshit.
The number of Americans who believe that the nation is headed in the right direction has roughly tripled since Barack Obama's election, and the public overwhelmingly blames the excesses of the financial industry, rather than the new president, for turmoil in the economy, according to a new Washington Post-ABC News poll.Bbbbbbut Lush Bimbo!!
Posted by Undeniable Liberal at 3/31/2009 05:35:00 PM
After sneakily splicing out 15 seconds from the middle of an ad critical of Satan's porcine handmaiden, Chris Wallace and Karl Rove just sit around playing with themselves, though Rove does call Chris a tool.
-- from dKos, with a h/t to the Duh! Institute and the NE chapter of the Center for the Blatantly Apparent.
Video here. Warning: contains the corpulent antichrist's hideous gob.
Posted by maru at 3/31/2009 04:31:00 PM
Now I feel covered in stanky trog-smeg. Brrrrrrrrrr. Yuck. Blehhchhhch.
American values, huh? A representative sample from the home page:
Gee, I could have SWORN their slogan was "it's time to say 'no' to biased media and 'yes' to fair play." More:
And in HUUUUGE text with pic:
Why does America hate America?
Posted by maru at 3/31/2009 04:26:00 PM
The nutbars are laughing themselves silly that thanks to the WH's 'assault' on asshole Rush Limpbaugh, he's drawn lots more listeners. Fuckwits. That's just what we wanted to happen. Either a large influx of megaditto-droolers will lead to a showdown with the more centrist republican voters in the next election -- where both will end up cancelling each other out in a matter/antimatter-type of annihilation -- or the new and the curious will be so repulsed they'll flee the party in droves.
Posted by maru at 3/31/2009 04:25:00 PM
NASA's "outreach to the public to drum up interest in the International Space Station" succeeded beyond their wildest dreams. So wtf is their problem?
'Wehhhhh! You don't like our pathetic, sanitary-napkin-brand name! Tough poopies! We're gonna call it that anyway!'
Why does NASA hate America?
|The Colbert Report||Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c|
|Space Module: Colbert - Democracy in Orbit|
Posted by maru at 3/31/2009 04:19:00 PM
prospectmag: "[F]ew expected the wheels to come off the new administration so quickly. Just weeks into its existence, the Obama White House is in trouble."
thenewmediajournal: "After only two months of the Obama presidency, Americans are horrified, angry, depressed, and on the verge of full-scale revolt against the president and his toadying Socialist acolytes for doing their best to destroy our once-vibrant economy, inflict decades of debt on our children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, and usher in what historians will surely record as The Age of The Hubristic and Incompetent Presidency. This assessment is borne out by polls, man-and-woman-in-the-street interviews."
Reality: You're fucking retards, both of you.
Posted by maru at 3/31/2009 04:18:00 PM
And not in a good way, either. At least not for
her him it.
The herpes-ridden posterfrau of the frothing right pisses off ... the frothing right. I am just loving this.
Is that what good Christians call "turning the other cheek"? Because if it is I'm confused.
Posted by maru at 3/31/2009 04:12:00 PM
March 30, 2009
Fox Noise launches website to encourage
WATB blamestorming "venting."
Fux's new 'Facebook'-styled site, Fox Nation's slogan is "It's Time to Say NO to Biased Media and Say YES to Fair Play and Free Speech." Because listening to Sean Hannity, Glenn Beck, Bill O'Reilly, Karl Rove, Mike Huckabee, et al, 24/7 is just not enough.
Sigh. They should think of changing their slogan to "All Hatred -- All the Time!"
Posted by maru at 3/30/2009 04:13:00 PM
The latest reality TV spectacular, The X-Tards!, will chronicle the megabattle to the death between Newt Gingrich, Sarah Palin, and Piyush Jindal on who will be the rightwingnut/evangelical-base candidate for 2012.
When the world's supposed to come to an end anyway.
Coincidence? I wonder.
Posted by maru at 3/30/2009 04:12:00 PM
This is like watching a train wreck in slow-motion!
Quotations mine. Hell, even the man who picked her to be his vice president seems to be backing off.
LOL. Good times. That was so awesome. Ladies and gentleman, the infamous Sarah Palin Turkey Massacre of 2008:
Posted by maru at 3/30/2009 04:03:00 PM
March 28, 2009
It's good to be the king.
Posted by maru at 3/28/2009 11:01:00 PM
Amid all the shitty economic news we have been seeing, hearing and experiencing lately, it's not all bad here at the new Liberal Manor. I just completed a 60 hour week. Yessiree, 20 hours of sweet, premium, time and a half pay, which is almost what I'm worth. While many people all across the land are unemployed or working four days a week, I'm pulling down some serious coin lately. I feel very fortunate.
Here's the funny thing. Guess what I do for a living? Nope I don't deal drugs and I'm not a pimp. I am a Manufacturing supervisor. For an automotive supplier. In Michigan. Hard to believe isn't it?
70% of our business is with Ford as the sole supplier of valves for their new six speed transmission, and apparently they are selling quite a few of them. Having recently become a very single guy, living on my own, the extra money is coming in quite handy.
After a few more paychecks like I have been getting. I'll be able to afford to sweep Maru off here pretty little feet, marry her, have a few little Maru Libs, and live snarkily happy ever after......again.
We were soulmates in a past life or two.
BTW, you will all be invited.
I hope you have a great weekend.
Posted by Undeniable Liberal at 3/28/2009 02:06:00 PM
More about the Gpukes' unicorns-and-bluebirds happy fun budget:
While reporters hooted at the comically simplistic charts and lack of details in the House Republican leadership’s budget plan, the green eyeshade types at Citizens for Tax Justice crunched the numbers. They conclude that a quarter of all households, most of them poor, would pay more taxes under the GOP plan, while the richest one percent would pay $100,000 less.
Pic from here.
Posted by maru at 3/28/2009 06:48:00 AM
I'm still half-asleep, but this caught my eye this morning. Here's a snip from a piece by PM Carpenter in response to their tone-deaf, hysterical presentation yesterday:
What difference would numbers have made? I mean, just how does one quantify, "We haven't a bloody clue"? How does one numerically characterize, "Jesus, this just dawned on us -- We can't believe we fell for this trick"? Just how, in heaven's name, can one slap a cold, impersonal figure on the red-faced human realization, "Oops, we're more stunningly hapless than we -- even you -- thought"?Amen to that.
I'll also offer Republicans a little sincere advice: Go away. Just go away for a long, long while. Grab whatever cash you have in the RNC account and hasten thee to a faraway exotic spa, or go on a year-long drunk, or simply hide yourselves at home, shutter the blinds, and shut the f*ck up.
It's not your critics doing you harm. It's you and your non-budgeting budgets which advocate spending freezes during a deep freeze. It's Dick Cheney running around defending torture and denouncing social progress. It's Sarah Palin babbling about deficiently prayerful McCainites. It's your Cantors and Pences and Boehners looking and sounding so insufferably goofy. It's Michael Steele strategizing with God but genuflecting before Rush. For those fond of reifying brevity, it can even be just two words: Michele Bachmann.
Come on, boys. Give it a merciful rest.
Posted by maru at 3/28/2009 06:10:00 AM
March 27, 2009
Quote of the day, from Paul Begala, on CNN,
The Republicans are like an arsonist who complains that the fire department is wasting water... Unless and until they do offer an alternative, they really have no right to whine about the president. For now at least, GOP stands for Got 0 Plans.Hold me, I think I just c-c-ccuuuu......good nite.
Posted by Undeniable Liberal at 3/27/2009 06:16:00 PM
"It looks like they're building a budget molecule!"
Budget "outline" written on Post-it note generates mirth, scorn from media:
(Parts slightly rephrased for clarity)
OMFG. The whole flailathon was so fucked up it made even other conservatives unhappy:
Mwwwahahahahahaha. Update: rethugs say they will release actual numbers sometime next Wednesday.
April Fool's Day.
Pic from here!
Posted by maru at 3/27/2009 03:58:00 PM
Infidels had cooties, explains holier-than-thou nincompoop.
She couldn't find anyone up to her standards to pray with. What would Jesus say?????
Annnnnnnnnd the comeback...
Holy shit, it's like the Crusades all over again. Re-enacted by morons.
Posted by maru at 3/27/2009 03:56:00 PM
The Alaskan pitbull governor cut and ran from a scheduled meeting with state legislative leaders -- because they publicly criticized her over her decision ("aka political grandstanding") to turn down part of Alaska's share of the stimulus money.
Boy, if she can't stand up to her own cabinet, how the hell is she going to keep us safe from al Qaeda?
Posted by maru at 3/27/2009 03:56:00 PM
March 26, 2009
Rushthuglibots unveil vague, slogan filled "alternative budget" with only one clear specific idea, and it's a revolutionary new idea. or not...
House Republican leaders called a press conference Thursday to unveil their "alternative budget." While it was thin on specifics, it does include one major policy proposal: a huge tax cut for the wealthy.When asked for more specifics, orange skinned drama queen John Boner(R-Citigroup) replied: "We'll get back with you. But it will be great, and I promise I won't cum in your mouth this time, I really really mean it."
Personally, I disagree with anybody's assertion that the Rushthuglibots haven't shit to offer..... that's ALL those sexually deprived tightly clenched dingleberry infested sphincters have to offer.
Posted by Undeniable Liberal at 3/26/2009 06:46:00 PM
In their continuing bid to maintain permanent minority status, GOP split on whether to reach out to moderate Dems in budget fight.
While Rep. Paul Ryan, R-Wis., held out an olive branch to moderate Democrats known as "Blue Dogs" Wednesday, calling on his "friends" to join the GOP in opposing the budget, House Minority Leader Big John Boehner slammed the group as "lap dogs."The double-fail: even when they're wrong, they get... wronger.
Posted by maru at 3/26/2009 04:31:00 PM
That was the headline over at the conservatard site noozebusters, where blaming the President is easier than thinking:
As do you. Maybe its because after the excruciatingly-long election run-up people just need to take a break? Or that after 8 years of gpukes running the country into the ground there isn't much good to report? Or maybe its because there hasn't been any exciting plane crashes or celebrity deaths or scandals to rubberneck over, which seems to be what most are interested in viewing anyway? Hmmmmm? Could any of those factor in at all? Of course not! Not in your tiny little world! Fucking idiot.
Next: the honeymoon with Obama is over: sales of arugula have slipped.
Posted by maru at 3/26/2009 04:30:00 PM
Ted Nugent at inhumanevents.com sympathizes with the President for not being able to put together a totally awesome kick-ass band or something:
This is where I stopped reading and grabbed a drink.
In other not-news, a serial womanizer/adulterer and pedophile who shit in his pants for a week to avoid serving in the military has his own column in a conservatard rag.
Posted by maru at 3/26/2009 04:19:00 PM
It's people like this that make me want to jam forks in my eyes. This is why we can never let our guard down for one freaking minute. Because there's always going to be one clueless, pathetic troll that hasn't gotten the fucking memo that it's 2009. Here, one of the basement people at towndump.com tediously spurts all over himself in hot, jealous rage:
Here we go again. 'Bipartisanship' is NOT a one-way street, you pedantic imbecile. No, the real story is that you can manage to breathe on your own -- but I guess all that hyperventilating is good for something, huh? To one of us, anyway. Idiot.
Posted by maru at 3/26/2009 04:17:00 PM
House Minority Whip Eric Cantor, who forgot to drink the kool-aid on a couple of issues, has "exasperated" many in his obstructionist, do-nothing party.
Well, you all suck. It's just that some of you suck a bit less than the others.
Posted by maru at 3/26/2009 04:14:00 PM
The posterpitbull for the party of values said last week she's accumulated more than half a million dollars for her defense against various complaints and may be forced to create a legal defense fund.
Maybe actually shutting the fuck up and going back to work might be a good place to start.
Posted by maru at 3/26/2009 04:14:00 PM
Not News: gpuke Congressman submits bill calling for proof of citizenship before elections in the future.
News: is told by MSNBC commentator to "take the Reynolds Wrap off your head."
Heh. From worldnutdaily, so no link. If you really want it, let me know and I'll post it in the comments.
Posted by maru at 3/26/2009 04:10:00 PM
March 25, 2009
Oopsie! Another simulpost. The lovely and snarkalucious Maru has has a great take on this below. Drug diseased, liberal minds think alike, you know.
Paul Begala, on CNN,
The Republicans are like an arsonist who complains that the fire department is wasting water... Unless and until they do offer an alternative, they really have no right to whine about the president. For now at least, GOP stands for Got 0 Plans.Hold me I think I'm going to c-c-ccuuuu......good nite.
Posted by Undeniable Liberal at 3/25/2009 04:41:00 PM
The rightwing blogger who called Bush "a man of extraordinary vision and brilliance approaching to genius" mocks Obama for mispronouncing the word "Orion."
Good gravy. A quick look back at the past master of eloquence:
-- And that was WITH a teleprompter. (thanks to Shower at fark for the quotes)
Bonus: the same rightwingnut blogger, Hindrocket from powerdump, enthusiastically supported the Disasta from Alaska Sarah "durrrr????" Failin.
Bonus 2: Letterman's 'Teleprompter Vs. No Teleprompter.'
Posted by maru at 3/25/2009 04:37:00 PM
I was going to post this yesterday, but was too disgusted by the waves of bile overflowing from this horrible, bottom-dwelling hosebag. Laura Ingraham's ignorant guest host Tammy McButthurt, snickering: "We've got trash in the White House." No, this isn't a repeat from 2001.
The actual audio is even worse. WTF is her problem?? I bet she considers herself a "good Christian," too. Fucking cunt.
Posted by maru at 3/25/2009 04:34:00 PM
Senate Republicans call budget reconciliation "an act of violence." But it was apparently totally legitimate 8 years ago. And then again 6 years ago. And again 2 1/2 years after that. And one more time 5 months later.
* See here.
Posted by maru at 3/25/2009 04:31:00 PM
Hapless douchewad Bobby Jindal again found himself opening up his yap-hole on Tuesday, saying republicans must be ready to defy the president when they disagree with his policies. Working towards a solution? Not so much.
His introduction of the new ObaMonitoring System was met with jeers, however, as the intended users are, after all, repuglicans and will automatically defy the [Democratic] President on everything anyway.
Comment from teh interweb: "Bobby Jindal wants everyone to know that it's OK to want someone to fail, especially if they just kicked your party's sorry ass half way across the country."
Posted by maru at 3/25/2009 04:30:00 PM