Our Nuts Are Bigger!!

In a bold, diplomatic move to ensure that Israel remains the dominant nookuleer power in the middle east, US Demands Israelis Stop Eating Iranian Muslim Pistachios.

"As a proud native of the golden state (California), I think Israelis should eat American nuts, not Iranian ones," said Stewart Tuttle, spokesliar for the U.S. Embassy in Tel Aviv.

This is just nuts. (ugghhh)