Headlines that sound like X-rated horror movies but aren't

From Time magazine: 'Can Obama Escape the Taint of Blagojevich?'

This can also be filed under "Headlines that make me want to reach through my computer to bitch-slap the author with a rotting salmon; then cockblock him in the nads while he screams for mercy."

I mean really. For the love of criminey. Though both the U.S. Attorney and the fucking article itself stated 'there was no evidence of wrongdoing' by President-elect Obama or his campaign, that hasn't stopped weasels like him -- or the AP's Donut Lady Liz 'siddonmyface' Sidoti -- from whoring, hyperventilating and misleading the public. Good jorb, assholes.