February 27, 2009
Headline of the day
-- from fark.com.
More like this, please
Issa: This isn't intended to be fighting words.
Matthews: They call themselves the Democratic Party. Let's just call people what they call themselves and stop the uh, the Mickey Mouse here. Save that for the stump -- seriously.
Issa: Chris, Chris.
Matthews: Now let's get to the issue here, seriously we've got a fiscal challenge. I want to go back to Congressman Frank and to some English here. Congressman Frank are you worried about the size of these WWII numbers here? Again, 1.75 trillion deficit this year. A spending level of almost 4 trillion. We're almost running deficits as big as the revenue number we're bringing in.
Frank: Well Chris let me first of all come to the defense of my colleague Mr. Issa and the Republicanistical Party that he represents...
Issa: Thanks, Barney.
Frank: You're welcome there Darrell. The point is this. For him to say "oh these are the Democrat's deficits"... I have never seen people disavow their own handiwork so quickly. And I knew that born again was an important strain in our society but born again deficit haters, it's a new version.
Sweet.
Just go away
Rest of the country: Maybe you need to STFU already, you fucking loser. Jeebus.
Repuglican values
Gregg, R-N.H., personally has invested hundreds of thousands of dollars in Cyrus Gregg's office projects at the Pease International Tradeport, a Portsmouth business park built at the defunct Pease Air Force Base, once home to nuclear bombers. Judd Gregg has collected at least $240,017 to $651,801 from his investments there, Senate records show, while helping arrange at least $66 million in federal aid for
Uh-huh.
Tax-cheating conservatard's book signing draws massive crowd of 11
So what's next for the unlicenced plumber? Well, when he's not speaking at conservative circlejerks, he'll be doing unlicenced construction. Bonus:
Sigh.
*If the American dream is to not have an actual job, not pay your taxes, and live off the pathetic petulance of a party of losers, well, yeah.
Former first lady adapts to new life
Zoned to the gills on Xanax and Fritos, Pickles Stepford says she didn't watch President Barack Obama's speech to Congress because "I just totally forgot about it."
-- from Jonathan Karl's adorable little puff-piece (mostly), written from the Bush mansion in an opulent, gated community in an exclusive section of Dallas.
Always-wrong columnist maintains perfect record
What, more tax cuts for the rich? Yes, the same party that ran this country into the ground for the past eight years are now suggesting we need more of the same. Either that, or do absolutely NOTHING. Wow. How totally irresponsible! What a patriot!
A commenter writes
The Washington Post should follow the lead of the NY Times and dump this rubbish master into the nearest trash can.
Dude.
A Popular Rising Star.........
About 11 people wandered into the rows of seats set up hopefully in the basement of a downtown Border's bookstore to hear Joe speak. Joe addressed them from behind a lectern and with a microphone, but that seemed unnecessarily formal.Of course, being an average guy that is so wildy popular is going to take a toll on his bright future as an unlicensed plumber:Wurzelbacher was scheduled to speak and sign books for three hours, but the Joe Show was over in 55 minutes. Total copies of "Joe the Plumber" sold: five.
Plumbing? Not happening. "I show up on a plumbing job and the first thing someone's going to say is 'Joe the Plumber didn't do the job right,' " he said. "The next thing you know, it's on the national news. It would be naive to go back to it."Now how could anybody think that a tax dodging, unlicensed shit clog cleaner do a bad job? How socialist!
15 . . . 14:59 . . . 14:58 . . .
CPAC agenda: "Joe" the taxcheating fake plumber to advise young conservaturds as panelist
Is he buying or selling?
The rethuglican Taliban, classy as always
Hmph. You know what else would be funny? If those pants-jizzing asswads at CPAC all caught the clap before dying in fiery plane crashes on their way back home. What a thigh-slapper.
Limbaugh to convene a 'female summit' to figure out why hos and castrating feminazis hate him
"I own the men, what must I do now to own women?"
Don't get me started. Oh, I don't know. Can a racist, sexist, child-abusing pig really "own" women? Especially a repulsive, bloated, egotistical scumbag like him? I think not.
February 26, 2009
Conservatards say the darndest things
Hannity: The stimulus bill has 9,000 earmarks.
Congressman: Name one.
Hannity: Salt marsh mice! ATVs! High-speed rail lines to Vegas!
Congressman: Sean, those words are absolutely not in the bill, and you know it.
Hannity: You hid them all.
Congressman: Sean, you're misleading the public.
Hannity: But... but... Clinton!
Congratulations. Your life continues to be a tiny, dim beacon of douchebaggery. You verminous twat.
I was a teenage demon-beater
Bonus: Not so fast, mister closet heathen. Party rival Sarah Palin, fuming at Jindal's evident glee that she may be consumed in the next (unmonitored!) explosion of Alaska's volcano, sics some of her good Catholic followers on him, smearing Jindal as a "secret Hindu."
Onus: Good luck with that. Bestial, Viagra-popping lardass Rush Limpbaugh is threatening to crush repukes like grapes if they even think of messin' with his widdle Bobster:
As one poster commented, Rush loves the guy because he "reminds you of those underage Dominican boy prostitutes you frequent, right, Rush?"
Americans erupt over repug's ignorant 'volcano' comment
Heh heh -- he said "butt."
February 25, 2009
Fun Stuff
Bipartisanshit
You know, shit like this is why I'll never stop making ralphing noises whenever I see this assclown's name. He adds:
Just one more thing you conservatards should be embarrassed about.

Yorrrrrrrrk!
"Barf alert" from freeretardia
Joe Brusuelas, director of market economics for Moody's Economy.com, gives Obama high marks for such "Reagan-esque" moments. More surprisingly for an economist who publicly supported John McCain, Brusuelas also applauded Obama for showing "leadership" on the vexing issue of how to resolve the banking crisis.
Barf! Because it'll be worth having the economy continue its slide down the crapper leaving us in a worldwide depression if it makes Obama look bad.
Above: typical freeper.
Always-wrong columnist maintains perfect record
Quote of the day
Bonus quote from a reader at The Atlantic:
Zoink!! Double bonus, from fark.com:
Why does Piyush hate our troops? And why does he hate his own constituents?
Hi, member me? Ah used tuh be th' preznit!
Look, maw! That no-talent prick was here! Says so on his jacket! And he didn't even buy anything, the cheap bastid!
Metric buttload of groups requesting special prosecutor for Bush, Cheney
Amen to that.
Repug tired of party leaders' crap
"Their fathers were relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owners from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery..."
"I don't even know the congressional leadership," Gov. Jon Huntsman Jr. said, shrugging off questions about top republicans, including weepy obstructionist cumbucket John Boehner and pudfaced nincompoop Mitch McConnell. "I have not met them. I don't listen or read whatever it is they say because it is inconsequential - completely."
He said congressional repukes failed to score political points for opposing the bill because the public saw them as objecting to Democrats rather than as taking a principled stand.
"As if. They wouldn't know 'principled' if it came up and bit them in the ass," he should have added.
Just Words
Sixty-eight percent of speech-watchers questioned in a CNN/Opinion Research Corp. survey said they had a very positive reaction, with 24 percent indicating that they had a somewhat positive response and 8 percent saying they had a negative reaction.92% positive, 8% overdosing on kool aid. Suck on THAT, Rethugs.
Palin's evangelical base slaps down Bristol
Where's Palin's vituperative comeback at Van Susteren or the NAEA?
Her silence says truckloads.
Such as 'I'm a hypocritical, unhinged nutbar! You betcha!'
Business as Usual
Suuurrrrrre, dickweed. These fucktwits are pissing me off. And they have their crusty panties in a wad because some welfare queen might eat steak.- Wednesday, Northern Trust hosted a fancy dinner at the Ritz followed by a performance by the group Chicago.
- Thursday, Northern Trust rented a private hangar at the Santa Monica Airport for dinner, followed by a performance by Earth, Wind & Fire.
- Saturday, Northern Trust had the entire House of Blues in West Hollywood shut down for its private party. We got the menu -- guests dined on seared salmon and petite Angus filet. Dinner was followed by a performance by none other than Sheryl Crow.
There was also a fabulous cocktail party at the Loews. And how's this for a nice touch: Female guests at the Chicago concert all got trinkets from ... TIFFANY AND CO.
Northern Trust gave us a statement yesterday before going total radio silence. A rep for the bank acknowledges they paid for the events, but that the bailout money did not pay for the events. He claims it was paid out of the bank's operating expenses
How fucked we are.
February 24, 2009
Change we can believe in
-- headline from fark.com
RNC Chair is down on layin' the smack on the wack crack jacks, yo
And their impotent, psycho hosebeast junkie leader Mr Limbaugh.
Vid from Fux Nooze is at something called thehopeforamerica.com.
Life sucks when you're this guy
Above: Sen. John McCain, R-Codger, sits all butthurt during the Fiscal Responsibility Summit hosted by US President Barack Obama. That's Barack Obama, the fucking President of the United States, loser. Heh.
Obama derangement syndrome
Heh. If only. From Eric Boehlert's 'Unhinged in 30 Days: The Right-Wing Media's Obama Era Implosion':
It's astounding to watch the avalanche of hate ooze from conservative media quarters. And why? Because Obama passed an economic recovery bill. Good Lord, imagine if he had failed to win the popular vote and then led the country into a pre-emptive war based on faulty intelligence, a war that lost thousands of American lives, and tens of thousands of foreign lives, while milking the U.S. treasury out of a few trillion dollars in the process.
Oh, snap!
Ahhhh... but conservaturd tears are so sweet... sweet and precious and so, so yumminiferous.
Hyperventilating rethug gasbag: "pardon me while I eat my own foot!"
JOHN FEEHERY: Well, he passed the biggest, pork-filled stimulus, whatever you want to call it, bill in history and now you're talking about fiscal responsibility [blah, blah, blah] but they go first with this huge pork bill...
O'DONNELL: Name one piece of pork, you simpleminded twit.
JOHN FEEHERY: Ummm, ummm, blah blah errrr, you can't do that to me right now. I can't think of it right now. But it was filled, huge, bunch of stuff that we don't even know what's in there.
You know, stuff! That I just pulled right out of my ass! 'Cause we don't know if it even exists! From dKos tv:
Doooooooouche.
Conservatards say the darndest things
Oh really. That's funny, because back on planet Earth...
The NYT:
MSNBC:
The WaComPo:
Had enough yet? No? Good:
Overall, Democrats maintain a nearly 2 to 1 edge over Republican'ts as the party Americans prefer to confront "the big issues" over the next few years.
Suck it, pukes.
Spreading the Wealth, Rethuglican Style
The truth is that the conservative economic policies that have dominated the last 30 years or so hasn't resulted in shared prosperity, but in greater disparity and greater concentration of wealth.Blunt truth. Much more at the link.
And there's great danger in that.
February 23, 2009
Headlines we'd like to see
Norm Coleman: shameless, obstructionist asswad
Coleman is putting his partisan interests ahead of the interests of Minnesotans. While the nation is in an economic crisis, Minnesota is missing a vote in the Senate. From the Star-Tribune:
Does Norm Coleman have a chance of winning?
"Does the Pope shit in the woods?" asked David Scholtz, a university law professor specializing in elections, assholes.
"Very slim," was how Duke University law Prof. Guy-Uriel Charles characterized Coleman's current chances.
"Coleman is in a bubble running out of oxygen," said Lawrence Jacobs, a University of Minnesota political science professor.
Coleman is a shit-bubble who should be deprived of oxygen, said cranky blogger.
moar funny pictures
So when DID you stop beating your kid?
Caribou Conspiracist: 'Media targeted, tried to destroy me'
As part of an interview with conservative hack circlejerker John Ziegler for his new film out this week, Wehhhh!: How the Drive-By Media Refused to Tongue-Bathe St Sarah's VP Campaign, Sarah Palin (R-Tinfoilia) said she believes the media made a decision that “we’re going to seek and we’re going to destroy this candidacy of Sarah Palin’s because of what it is that she represents.”Howard "Screamin'" Dean, Al "I invented the internet" Gore, serial rapist Bill Xlintoon and his murdering lesbian wife Hitlary could not be reached for comment. Socialist commie B. HUSSEIN Osama and his Muslim baby-mama were too busy terrist fistjabbing to make a statement.
“Obviously something big took place in the media,” she added. It is “very frightening, I think, what the media was able to get away with, this go around.”
Palin suggested that unbalanced media coverage posed a threat to democracy.
Miserable failure's shrine to pop-up books a bust
Who’s beating him? His own dad, and some guy who owns a porn collection. Even pages mocking the former president rank higher.
Donny Sullivan, editor-in-chief of Search Engine World, said the site -- just like the former president himself -- is “below average” and is probably failing in efforts to raise money because of its low ranking, low subject matter, and low interest in multiple well-thumbed and stained copies of "My Pet Goat."
The lieberry's mission statement, is in part:
To which one wag commented
Indeed.
February 21, 2009
Around blogtopia
Translation: "Your inactivity is criminal, porcine gastropod…Go back to Oklahoma!"
February 20, 2009
Has Atlantis been found off Africa?
The perfect rectangle – which is around the size of Wales* – was noticed on the search giant's underwater exploration tool by an aeronautical engineer who claims it looks like an "aerial map" of a city.
* Wales is around 121 times the size of Liechtenstein, or 6.2 Rhode Island Units.
Update: not so fast, Donovan!
Doughy pantload: "mmmrrrrrrrll! Ffffrgh wffff nrrrgh blllrrrr!"
Lawdy! What a dipshit! Wtf is this guy's problem? And how does he manage to keep getting paid for this crap?
Disclaimer: I only was able to peruse a small portion of this steaming heap of drivel. When I tried to see the entire piece at townhell.com, it chucked me completely out of the interwebs. That's it: I'm complaining to Michael Steele.
*Who does NOT have a bright blue scrotum. That we know of.
GOP legislator: Sarah Palin is "Dan Quayle with a ponytail"
Meanwhile, a commenter at the WaComPo has a simple suggestion for the beleaguered ditz:
lulz
February 19, 2009
Dude Looks Like a Wingnut
Not that it will stop them.....
THIS Ought to Work Out Well
Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics, by applying the party's principles to “urban-suburban hip-hop settings.Who let the dogs out? It worked out well for Mitt, didn't it?