"John Kerry went hunting for geese in Ohio, but pResident Bush says Kerry only did it for the photo op. The weird part is that Bush said this while wearing a flight suit and standing on the deck of an aircraft carrier." - Conan O'Brien
"Kerry is trying to appeal to hunters, so he got drunk and shot his buddy in the ass." - David Letterman
"Neither Bush or Kerry have gotten a flu shot and both said today they won't get one. Ralph Nader also said he wasn't getting a flu shot. Though in his case he doesn't need one because he doesn't come in contact with any large crowds." - Jay Leno
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