The Dating Game

Not-gay gay governor Charlie Crist, colored fella Bobby Jindal -- who's only been in public office for about 6 months -- and serial flipflopping dog-torturer Mitt Romney are all set to meet with Saint McBush this weekend as he searches for a running mate.

Rethug hopefuls plan a weekend retreat at McInsane's lavish Arizona mansion/estate, watching "Matlock" reruns, engaging in witty banter with the candidate's 186-year-old mother, tactfully avoiding his wealthy ice-queen wife, and trying to convince the senile old fuck that they would be the best man for the job of covering up for him.

Meanwhile, the NY Times' resident douche, Bill Kristol -- who formerly had named every republican-of-color existing as the VP pick-- thinks it'll go to vichyrat Joe Lieberman. Whereby I'll promptly puke up my lunch, breakfast and what'll be left of my upper small intestine. Though he has been wrong before.


"Pick me! You won't regret it!"