McCain denies immigration reversal, lima beans, caterpillars

Waffles McMaverick told Hispanics Monday he had not flip-flopped on immigration reform in order to appease conservative troglodytes.

"I do ask for your trust that when I say, I remain committed to fair, practical and comprehensive immigration reform, I really mean it this time," McCain told the suckers National Council of La Raza at the San Diego Convention Center. "I am not a communist. I may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but I am not a porn star."