October 22, 2002

Actually had to scrape my windshield this morning.

Bill Clinton's Penis Used Veterans', Senior Citizens' Accounts to Pay for N Korea's Nuke Program: headline we're bound to see any day now.

Which leg, sir?
Dana Milbank of the Washingtoon comPost whores around the fact that W is a flaming, out-and-out liar. Whereas Al Gore had a "knack for distortions and exaggerations", Condi's Widdle Cokehead has "flights of fancy" or "off-the-cuff mistakes." Good article to read just before going out to split logs.

Shot in the ass and you're to blame - you give guns a bad name.*
Another future Darwin Award winner. A woman was airlifted to the hospital Sunday afternoon, after her gun fell into the commode and shot her in the buttocks. The woman heard something outside her home and reached over the toilet to raise the window and the gun fell in. The woman was injured when the 9 mm handgun discharged into the toilet bowl, reports say.
*With apologies to Jon Bon Jovi and TBogg.

Nurse, another sedative for the vice president, please...
"This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating." - the Oaf of Office, April 23, 2002.

WH Flip-Flops on Iraq 'Policy'
King George the Waffler said Monday that the United States was trying diplomacy "one more time" to disarm Saddam "peacefully" and suggested that if the Iraqi leader complied with every United Nations mandate it would "signal the regime has changed." Nursemaids to Bunnypants shooed reporters away before they could ask follow-up questions.
Afterwards, the White House said that Mr. Bush was not backing away from his past insistence that Mr. Hussein must leave office.
Must've been another one of those off-the-cuff mistakes.

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