WTF Is It Now?!?

This just in:
The BFEE Oil Cartel US has walked out of the UN after being called "war criminals" by the Iraqis. Well, sort of. Ironically enough, it was John Negroponte who was feeling insulted. - link.




"Only one question per question"
From the actual transcript of the Blair/Bush bullshitathon:
pReznit Stupid: We'll take two questions a side. We would hope that you would respect asking one question per question. Fournier.

Q: That, of course, means I can ask each leader one question.

The Petulant Pretender: No, it does not mean that. Of course, you will anyway, but --

Q: Mr. President, can you help me understand the timing of this war? You talked yesterday that it will be - we're far from over. Today you said, it's going slowly, but surely we're working our way to our end goal. Given that the resistance has been as strong as it's been in the south, and that we have what you call the most hardened, most desperate forces still around Baghdad, are we to assume that this is going to last - could last months and not weeks - and not days?

The Court-Appointed Idiot: I'll answer that question very quickly and then get to his. However long it takes to win. That's --

Q: -- take months?

The Nooculer Gnatbrain: However long it takes to achieve our objective. And that's important for you to know, the American people to know, our allies to know, and the Iraqi people to know.

Q: It could be months?

pReznit Stupid: However long it takes. That's the answer to your question and that's what you've got to know. It isn't a matter of timetable, it's a matter of victory. And the Iraqi people have got to know that, see. They've got to know that they will be liberated and Saddam Hussein will be removed, no matter how long it takes.

Q: But could I ask you both - you both talked about the history, the justness of the cause that you believe that this war is. Why is it then, that if you go back to that history, if you go back over the last century or, indeed, recent conflicts in your political careers, you have not got the support of people who have been firm allies, like the French, like the Germans, like the Turkish? Why haven't you got their support?

Crabby McCokehead: We've got a huge coalition. As a matter of fact, the coalition that we've assembled today is larger than one assembled in 1991 in terms of the number of nations participating. I'm very pleased with the size of our coalition. I was down yesterday at CENTCOM and met with many of the generals from the countries represented in our coalition, and they're proud to be side-by-side with our allies. This is a vast coalition that believes in our cause, and I'm proud of their participation.

Q: They're not Western allies. Why not?

Drinky McDumbass: We have plenty of Western allies. We've got - I mean, we can give you the list. Ally after ally after ally has stood with us and continues to stand with us. And we are extremely proud of their participation. - Poor Tony Blair. - link.