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Chimp in a flightsuit calls gay marriage ruling 'troubling'
Jebus's favorite compassionate conservative, pReznit Poopstain, said yesterday the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court's ruling on homosexual marriage was "deeply troubling," and he chided "activist judges" who seek to "redefine marriage by court order."
"He believes it's an issue of great consequence. That's why he said [in last month's State of the Union address] that the people's voice must be heard," White House spokes-hamster, the hairy-palmed Scott McClellan, quivered yesterday. "People besides those icky homos."
"Marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman," our saintly leader said in a statement issued yesterday. "Just ask my brother Neil, or Henry Hyde or Bob Barr, or Bob Livingston, Asa Hutchison, Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh, Dick Armey, Dan Burton...."
February 5, 2004
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