WTF Is It Now?!?

Quotes
"A new study suggests that middle-aged adults who go on periodic drinking binges may face a heightened risk of dementia later on in life. The study is entitled, 'National Strategy for Victory in Iraq.'" - Tina Fey

"In a speech yesterday, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld criticized the media for casting the war in Iraq in a negative light. Yeah, he said they should focus on the light-hearted and fun aspects of the war." - Conan O'Brien

"President Bush and the first lady sent Christmas cards to the leaders of 200 countries. Yeah, it would have been 201, but someone told the president that Legoland is not a real country." - Conan O'Brien

"President Bush lit the National Christmas Tree. The tree has over 25,000 lights. One for every indicted member of the administration." - Leno, between making jokes about Bill Clinton's di*k.