April 25, 2007

Joke of the Day

So did you guys hear the one about Chimpy McMissionaccomplished and the purple hearts? Apparently now, all you have to do to earn a purple heart is have your rich CIA daddy get you out of Vietnam so you can drink all day and ride your coke high all night--oh, and then become a horrible failure of a president and get your feelings hurt by the big, mean liberal media. This killed me:

Thomas said he and his wife came up with the unprecedented idea to present the president with the Purple Heart over breakfast one morning a few months ago as they discussed the verbal attacks, both foreign and domestic, the commander in chief has withstood during his time in office.

"We feel like emotional wounds and scars are as hard to carry as physical wounds," Thomas said.
Could you just close your eyes for a moment and imagine--just for a moment, remember--what the republi-whore media would have done had Bill Clinton accepted a purple heart from some guy for "verbal attacks" from the media?? The pundit circle jerk would have lasted months, each more outraged than the next. Tom Delay would be foaming at the mouth. O'Reilly would manufacture so much outrage, he'd need a fucking warehouse to store it all.

This shit ain't add up. Ain't add up at all, my friends.

He so loves to pretend he's someone else. A flight suit with generous bulge comes to mind.

"I'm tough. I'm a war preznit. I got a purple heart for bein' brave."



Undeniable Liberal said...

Isn't this party at Maru's gettin fun! The panty drawer is mine!

JasonC said...

I'm trying to find her porn stash.... I know it's here somewhere.

Anonymous said...

Try looking under her bed for anything that looks like a big shoebox and is marked 'catfood' to throw people off.

Labrys said...

Yeah, I about barfed at the idea of anyone thinking he deserved a Purple Heart. A kick in the ass, maybe. Could we create a medal to do that?

Buttermilk Sky said...

The Purple Heart has an image of George Washington on it. Maybe it will sear George Wanker's flesh like a crucifix on a vampire. Worth a try.

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