November 4, 2007

Conservative savior's BFF a drug lord

Senile Republican presidential and law 'n' order candidate Frederick of Hollywood has been happily using a private jet lent to him by a close adviser who has a criminal record for drug dealing.

Philip Martin entered a plea of guilty to the sale of 11 pounds of marijuana in 1979; the court withheld judgment pending completion of his probation. He was charged in 1983 with violating his probation and with multiple counts of felony bookmaking, cocaine trafficking and conspiracy. He pleaded no contest to the cocaine-trafficking and conspiracy charges, which stemmed from a plan to sell $30,000 worth of the drug, and was continued on probation.
Thompson's campaign said just like the candidate was not aware of the Terri Schiavo controversy, the fact that the Soviet Union had broken up, or that oil drilling in the Everglades would piss off Florida voters, Thompson was not aware of the multiple criminal cases, all of which were described in public court records.


"Flyswatters! Camels! Jujubes!"

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