Dum-dum!

As he leaves the comfort of his La-Z-Boy, Ol' Pillowface says more surprises are in store.

About three months after his initial campaign kick-off, Fred Thompson returned to Iowa with a re-invigorated [sic] pitch: waking up, and trying to scare votes out of moron-America.

Thompson warned the country is "one successful terrorist plan away from nuclear attack."

Barely pausing to clear his throat, the former Hollywood actor boomed, "it's not time for on-the-job training."

Indeed.

"All I've got to say is saddle me up." -- Frederick of Hollywood, 12/18/07. Yuck.


"Love your chaps, young fella!"