December 5, 2008

8 years of puppies and unicorns are almost at an end

The worst president ever and his "mastermind," corpulent antichrist Karl Rove, have launched the “Bush legacy project" -- no! don't laugh! -- a new propaganda campaign that will pretend we all spent the past eight years pooping rainbows of joy.

In related news, here's today's stuff that really never happened, or if it did it was Clinton's fault:

  • U.S. job losses worst since 1974: employers slashed 533,000 jobs in November, the most in 34 years, catapulting the unemployment rate to a 15-year high.

  • Halliburton, KBR sued for unsafe conditions at Iraq base: Dick Cheney's "former" company Halliburton and its subsidiary KBR exposed thousands of workers to unhealthy and contaminated conditions. Contaminated by body fluids and putrefied remains.

  • More problems for major post-9/11 security program: a program spurred by the September 11th attacks to safeguard seaports is "an abysmal failure."

  • Brain-injured troops face unclear long-term risks: many of the thousands of troops who suffered traumatic brain injuries in Iraq and Afghanistan are at risk of long-term health problems including depression, Parkinson's-like symptoms, seizures and Alzheimer's.

  • Bush to exempt toxin from federal regulation: Feds are set to eliminate water regs for perchlorate, a known neurotoxin found at unsafe levels in the drinking water of millions of Americans.

  • Jon Stewart has more, here.

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