January 12, 2009

Bush reveals plan to write a memoir

Stupie McLintbrain revealed Sunday that he plans to write a book after leaving office later this month, but admitted he's not yet sure what it will be about.

Dur!

"Me-moir" -- that sounds like one of them Frenchificated words. Ah prefer to call it a Me-book. Cause ah'm gonna be writin it. But whut color should I use for my dinosaur?

"I'm not quite exactly sure what it's going to be, but uhhhhh I'm toying with the idea of uhhhhh maybe describing the toughest decisions Karl and Unca Di... uhhhh, I had to make as president and the context in which I made them," Bush said in an interview on the RNC propaganda nutwork, Fux Nooze.
Oh God no. Like what, ignoring the economy? Choosing Count Chocula as your cereal 'cause it's less scary than Boo Berry or that one with the creepy rabbit on the box? Picking Fleapit, Texas as your fake 'authentic downhome everyman countryboy Western WH'? Reading My Pet Goat as the country blew up? Giving Tenet the Freedom from Intelligence award? Not anticipating the breech in the levees and partying instead?
"What's evident to me is that it is very hard for people to remember what life was like a mere four or five years ago, {You mean BEFORE you totally fucked things up beyond all repair? No, we remember. Idiot. -- Ed.} and it could be very important for me to recreate the environment in which I had to make certain decisions, particularly the environment of right after September the 11th, 2001," he said.
"Like when ah blamed Iraq for th' terrist attacks, frightened most of America by calling their patriocitude into question, an' pissing on th' Constitution."

Shit. Maybe he should have Barney write the damn thing. It would have more truth in it.

4 comments:

big em said...

IF I was forced to listen to one of them (ala "Mystery Science Theatre 3000"), I'd actually pick Sarah Palin over W -- only because she never actually got a chance to fuck things up as royally as W.

To try and find a silver lining in these last 8 yrs it's this: W fucked things up SO obviously, SO blatently, SO clueslessly that even the generally indifferent, uninformed US voter sensed that things were BAD, and it has lead to a significant softening in the Neo-con beliefs that too many people casually accepted (because it played to their greed, racism, and unjustified self-righteousness). If the Neo-cons had run a even mildly competent/accomplished candidate back in 2000, they might still be in power for another couple of election cycles before it all collapsed. I think W has sullied the title of 'conservative' -- at least among the undecided voter -- so disasterously that it may be 3 or 4 election cycles before we see another Repuke POTUS!

Anonymous said...

I understand Darth Cheney told his buddy and Never-met-a war-I -didn't -cheerlead -others to fight Sean Hannity that he might write a book cuz he's got some stories to tell and "scores to settle".... Apparently outing a covert cia agent, declaring himself the Barnicle fourth branch of the US guv't, using the US constitution as toilet paper, and shooting his friend in the face without killing him just wasn't enough "score settling" for him.

::mwah:: said...

"It were a dark and stormy night..."

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