January 22, 2009

Palin to news organizations: "Look at me! Me me me me me!"

The Disasta from Alaska, pouting because she hasn't been in the news for a few days, throws another media-centric temper tantrum guaranteed to get her coverage. Why are we covering her? Well, 'cause she's like a fucking trainwreck.

The offensive Sarah Palin is going on the offensive against news organizations and bloggers she says are perpetuating malicious gossip about her and her trailertrash spaw -- sorry, her unwed HS drop-out lil rednecks. But political observers say the former beauty contestant can't have it both ways: trotting out the children to showcase her family values, then trying to shield them from scrutiny.

[I]n recent weeks, she has personally reached out to media outlets such as People magazine, Fux Nooze and the AssPress to complain... Experts believe the first-term governor is engaged in a campaign to keep her name in the spotlight.

"I think she's exploiting and cultivating the anti-intellectual and anti-elitist side of the Republican party. But I repeat myself," said Leonard Sheldon, professor and expert on unhinged nutbars. "She's trying to salvage her reputation, so she attacks the messenger. If she would just shut the fuck up her problem would be solved."

The clueless hosebag's complaints about the media assure continued coverage, said Lisa Burns, associate professor of media studies at Quinnipiac University.

"The media interest will wane. I think it already has," Burns said. "I have to wonder if this is something she's doing to keep her name out there."

"Christ, yeah. If there's a bigger attention whore out there right now, I'd certainly like to know about it," sighed Sheldon, pretending to stick forks in his eyes.