From the Dept. of You Can't Make This Shit Up

Cry me a fucking river and call a wahhhmbulace.

"That is pretty draconian, $500,000 is not a lot of money, particularly if there is no bonus," said James F. Reda, founder and managing director of James F. Reda & Associates, a compensation consulting firm. "And you know these companies that are in trouble are not going to pay much of an annual dividend."

Will someone please inflict me with such Draconian measures? How in hell a person who can't arrange their finances well enough to live on a half a million a year can expect to be taken seriously as a professional money manager?
Simple solution:
Don't take our money, douche nozzles!
There, fixed it.