February 9, 2009

What's So Civil About Civil War?

Fuck the South

The next dickwad who says, "It’s your money, not the government's money" is gonna get their ass kicked. Nine of the ten states that get the most federal fucking dollars and pay the least... can you guess? Go on, guess. That’s right, motherfucker, they're red states. And eight of the ten states that receive the least and pay the most? It’s too easy, asshole, they’re blue states. It’s not your money, assholes, it’s fucking our money. What was that Real American Value you were spouting a minute ago? Self reliance? Try this for self reliance: buy your own fucking stop signs, assholes.

Let’s talk about those values for a fucking minute. You and your Southern values can bite my ass because the blue states got the values over you fucking Real Americans every day of the goddamn week. Which state do you think has the lowest divorce rate you marriage-hyping dickwads? Well? Can you guess? It’s fucking Massachusetts, the fucking center of the gay marriage universe. Yes, that’s right, the state you love to tie around the neck of anyone to the left of Strom Thurmond has the lowest divorce rate in the fucking nation. Think that’s just some aberration? How about this: 9 of the 10 lowest divorce rates are fucking blue states, asshole, and most are in the Northeast, where our values suck so bad. And where are the highest divorce rates? Care to fucking guess? 10 of the top 10 are fucking red-ass we're-so-fucking-moral states. And while Nevada is the worst, the Bible Belt is doing its fucking part.
Indeed, and the truth shall set you free.

6 comments:

One Fly said...

You're being too damn nice again Maru.

Anonymous said...

Link mentions the highest murder rates are in the south. Always has been. Great book on this is "All God's Children" by Fox Butterfield. Story on the kid that changed the law to allow children to be charged as adults. Starts with the history of violence and put it smack dab in S. Carolina.

Distributorcap said...

i think red states also have the lowest life expectancy and highest infant mortality rates

Lex Alexander said...

This one has been around for a while, and it's worth noting that since it was created, some of the states that were red last time around went blue this time (including mine).

Capt. Bat Guano said...

'Nuff said.

Anonymous said...

Facts!
Damn Facts!

Is that all you've got to refute our predeceived notions??

Tsk. Tsk.

You'll have to do better than that, Missy.