"Please don't shoot us, but you're not helping, really," cowering rethugs tell the deranged cyborg from behind a protective concrete slab.
Congressional republicans are imploring Dick Cheney to go back to his undisclosed location and leave them alone.
Displeased with the former vice-president's recent media appearances, rethugs say he's hurting GOP efforts to "reinvent itself" after back-to-back electoral drubbings and its daily WATB carping, moaning, obstructionism and hyperpartisanship.
The veep, who showed a penchant for secrecy, torture and using the Constitution as a buttrag during his eight years in the White House, has popped up in media interviews to defend the Bush-Cheney record which everyone knows was a total fucking disaster.
Rep. John Duncan Jr. (R-Tenn.) said, “He became so unpopular while he was in the White House that it would probably be better for us politically if he wouldn’t be so public."