March 19, 2010

No shooting in the Big Tent, America-haters!

Save those itchy fingers for the company circlejerks, Fox Noise’s repulsive founder tells his toadies.

Roger Ailes is asking the network's Glenn Beck haters to stop "shooting in the tent," claiming the in-house anti-Beck vitriol is unprecedented in the company's 14-year history.

"For the first time in our 14 years, we’ve had people apparently shooting in the tent, from within the tent," he told them, obviously not giggling childishly picturing metric buttloads of thick white gelatinous fluid dripping from the nutwork’s circus canvas.

He then switched to a more appalling metaphor:

"We prefer people in the tent not dumping on other people in the tent," he said, adding, “Especially when it’s my hand-picked, fair-haired personal little flunkie.”

Ailes warned that people who found it hard to stand in Beck’s shadow had another option besides denigrating their own team.

"If I couldn’t defend the family, I’d leave,” the Fux Godfather said. “I’d go to another family."
Fair… and balanced!