March 7, 2011

Republican Plan to Address Global Warming

From a great new site I just found, Dirty Hippies

The Republican Party today announced a comprehensive plan to address global warming. As the Party never believed global warming exists, it came as a surprise even to themselves.

“Unlike Democrat tax and regulate plans, this is simple, comprehensive, and handles the problem immediately, once and for all”, said House Speaker, John Boehner, a-glowing. “Instead of stopping global warming it reverses it. And, we know this is a good bill because it is only one-page long.”

The bill, authored by freshman Tea Party Member Ben Quayle—whose Vice-President father, Dan, was said to have promoted a manned-mission to the sun, proposing to avoid the extreme heat by going at night–is called the “Reverse [Non-Existent] Global Warming With a Stroke of the Pen” Act. It outlaws Fahrenheit, substituting Celsius for all temperature readings, reports and thermometers, and thereby instantaneously reduces all temperatures.
Great site, more seriousness than snark, but great site. Check it guys, I think you'll like it.

3 comments:

admin said...

what happened to the dirty hippies website? does anyone know?

Unknown said...

That mini-article was fantastic. Leave it to the son of Dan Quayle to go "LALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU MISTER SUN!" and make the problem go away.

I fell out of my chair, laughing!

Chris Vosburg said...

My favorite Dan Quayle aprocrypha was that he once tried to grant Clutch Cargo an advisorship to the National Space Council.