April 1, 2010
Not quite getting the concept
Anti-government militia nutjobs who preached violent revolution to overthrow the government asks the government to provide lawyers after they get arrested.
Repulsive conservatard just can’t stop lying
But I repeat myself. Fux Noise’s Sean Hannity explains why he's a doucheba… excuse me, a "Reagan conservative" -- by promoting lies about Reagan.
Hannity, purporting to explain what a "Reagan conservative" is, claimed that Saint Ronnie of Reagan created 21 million new jobs, doubled federal revenues, oversaw the longest peacetime economic expansion in history, healed the sick and married Morgan Fairchild. None of that is true.There. we decided.
Furor grows over celebrity non-appearances on Palin show
“An interview show based around her interviews with people she's never interviewed.”
The Disasta from Alaska retains her title as she fucks up something else.
Tuesday: Look! See, black people like Sarah Palin!
Wednesday: Fuck you talkin bout, bitch?
Thursday: Uh, country/western singers don’t like her either.
Hours after LL Cool J complained that Fox "News" was recycling an old interview with him for a new program hosted by former journamalism major Sarah Palin, representatives for the country musician Toby Keith, who was also listed as a guest for the show, made a similar charge against the cable channel.Boy, if she’s lost Toby fucking-NASCAR-9/11 Keith… !
In a telephone interview, a baffled Elaine Schock, publicist for Keith said: “I have no idea what interview they are using. Toby’s talked to Fox a number of times years ago, and I had no idea that this was going to be on Sarah Palin’s special. Fox has never contacted me.”
As for Mr. Keith, Ms. Schock said she had spoken to the singer about his inclusion in the Palin special. Asked his reaction, she said, “I’m not going to comment on what Toby feels about it.”
The party of personal irresponsibilitude ‘n’ tax cheats
Sean Hannity and his Freedom Alliance scam are facing FTC complaints and a possible IRS investigation. How fucking SWEET.
[O]utrage from concerned communist citizens over Hannity's use of the organization to burnish his patriot credibility with questionable allotment of funds for actual veterans and their families has apparently led to Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington (CREW) formally filing a complaint with the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) and the IRS. […]Why does Sean Hannity hate our troops??
As far the IRS request for investigation, CREW alleges that Freedom Alliance has failed to live up to the restrictions for its tax-exempt status.
March 31, 2010
Ob'omneycare
It's... it's... it's different because I'm a republican, dammit!!
"What's more enjoyable than watching Mitt Romney attempt to bend, twist and wiggle his way through a contradictory political position? Not much."
LULZ. From here, if the video doesn't work.
We had eight years of Bush and Cheney -- now you get mad?
Who’s the fascist commie socialist Hitler-lover NOW, huh?
You didn't get mad when the Supreme Court stopped a legal recount and appointed a President.-- From here and here.
You didn't get mad when Cheney allowed energy company officials to dictate energy policy.
You didn't get mad when a covert CIA operative got outed.
You didn't get mad when the Patriot Act got passed.
You didn't get mad when we illegally invaded a country that posed no threat to us.
You didn't get mad when we spent over 600 billion (and counting) on said illegal war.
You didn't get mad when over 10 billion dollars just disappeared in Iraq .
You didn't get mad when you found out we were torturing people.
You didn't get mad when the government was illegally wiretapping Americans.
You didn't get mad when we didn't catch Bin Laden.
You didn't get mad when you saw the horrible conditions at Walter Reed.
You didn't get mad when we let a major US city, New Orleans , drown.
You didn't get mad when we gave a 900 billion tax break to the rich.
You didn't get mad when the deficit hit the trillion dollar mark.
You didn't get mad when the president ignored the clear and timely warning that terrorists were going to hijack planes and fly them into the WTC.
You didn't get mad when the weapons inspectors, who said there were no WMDs, were ignored.
You didn't get mad when hundreds of thousands of people died in Iraq .
You finally got mad when the government decided that people in America deserved the right to see a doctor if they are sick. Yes, illegal wars, lies, corruption, torture, stealing your tax dollars to make the rich richer, are all okay with you, but helping other Americans... oh hell no.
They didn’t get mad when Dumbyah said the Constitution was “just a goddamn piece of paper,” either.
C-Span caller: “what’s with all the Negroes?”
I’m hoping this is just a joke.
A caller to C-Span, who identified himself as a Republican from North Carolina, accused the network of taking too many phone calls from black people.You know, the line at the back of the bus.
"You have black folks calling in on the Republican line, independents. And you have so many of 'em I can't believe this is just an accident. If you keep on with the way you've been programming, you should change your name from C-Span to Black-Span," he said. "I know they have an opinion but I wish that they would be honest and call in on the right line."
Tarnation! There ain’t no way a n****r kin be a republican! Shee-it!
Gawd.
GOP to Dems: “fuck your civility campaign”
GODFUCKINGDAMMIT!!
The Republican National Committee has rejected a proposal from Democrats to sign a joint statement that would have called for “elected officials of both parties to set an example of the civility we want to see in our citizenry.”
Celebrity hockey-mom gets yet another TV show
And it’s not My Kids Can Avoid Criminal Charges Because I’m a Republican Celebrity.
“Sarah Palin will take her first stab at television hosting when she fronts a new Fox News [sic] series, Real American Stories, premiering Thursday April 1 at 10pmET. Guests for the first show include country singer Toby Keith, rapper/actor LL Cool J and GE CEO Jack Welch.”
What, was Vanilla Ice too busy?
A rich guy, another rich guy, and a mega-rich guy. Real America.
Matzohl tov, idiot
Psycho California GOP candidate Carly Fiorina calls Passover a time for people to "break bread" together. You know, Passover -- the holiday that begins with going through your house to throw away all the bread.
After howls of hilarity occurred across the intarwebs, the Fiorina camp backtracked and issued the following explanation:
”We meant all bread, leavened and unleavened, and matzo is just unleavened bread so that's what we meant by that.”Yeah… that’s the ticket…
Schmucks.
Anti-American liberal elite prank results in dozens of cars being towed at Glenn Beck rally
Garage owner reaps windfall harvesting tinfoil wrapped around car aerials.
Dozens of Glenn Beck fans who emerged from an event at the University of Central Florida to find their cars gone say they were the victims of a fraternity prank. They followed signs directing them toward free parking, only to later discover that their cars had been towed from a Kappa Sigma parking lot. The 53 Beck fans had to shell out $125 each at the impound lot.I can’t stop laughing.
The owner of the tow company says it was his busiest day ever.
The fine print is awesome.
The party of personal responsibility
December: Sarah Palin leaves Hawaiian vacation over “McCain visor” publicity.
March: Sarah Palin left Hawaiian vacation over daughter’s breaking, entering, partying, and causing more than $20,000 in damages.
Spoiled Palin spawn avoids criminal charges thanks to her bootstrappy, real-American wholesome, average hockey-mom:
According to sources close to the Alaska State troopers there was a secret weekend meeting. This meeting took place between the Palins and some very highly placed people involved in the juvenile justice department. Directly after this secret meeting the word came down to the juvenile justice probation officer that ONLY the boys who had participated would be charged with the crime. Willow Palin and the girls would only be identified as “witnesses” and face no criminal penalties.Welp, THAT’s certainly not a segment we’ll see on Bible Spice’s wholesome and patriotic new television show.
This has made the State Troopers and those working in the juvenile justice department very, very unhappy. But there was nothing they could do, the Palins had connections, and for them apparently the law simply did not apply.
War criminal booed off stage
"The only comfort I take is that you're going to rot in hell," America-hater tells corpulant, traitorous antichrist.
Notorious war criminal Karl Rove was heckled and branded a 'war criminal' at a book signing inThe irony-challenged Rove, who defended his misadministration's stance of pissing all over the Bill of Rights, said the interruptions reflected the "totalitarianism of the left."GuantanBeverly Hills Monday night.
Rove, who still isn’t in prison, was at the Saban Theater to discuss his new book, "Courage and Consequences: I Have No Idea What Those Two Things Mean.”
But audience members were unable to get their copies of the book signed after the bloated chickenshit was shouted down and forced to leave the stage.
Heckling. Free speech. The "totalitarianism of the left." Jeebus Christmas.
It's called Freedom Pwnage. You porculant fuck.
March 26, 2010
Hurrrrr derp derp derp
Giving the "keep your government hands off my Medicare!” idiots a run for their money, some mouthbreather is upset that the federal govt is ‘taking over the federal student loan program.’
The nutjob? Republican US Sen Lamar Alexander.
"The Democratic majority decided, well look, while we're at it, let's have another Washington takeover," said Alexander. "Let's take over the federal student loan program."
The switch to direct government loans will result in savings to boost Pell Grants and make it easier for some workers to repay their student loans. In addition, some borrowers could see lower interest rates and higher approval rates on student loans.
Lindsey Graham puts down the Cub Scout and picks up John McCain’s dick
‘Those mean ol’ Democwats were so partisan!,’ lisped the partisan lickspittle on the bill not one repuglican voted for.
Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-Ectum) says the prospects for passing any more major legislation may be lost now that the Dems have all but finished up health care. One problem, he says, is that Democrats may not have the appetite after health care to commit to addressing other tough issues. But beyond that, he says, members of the GOP might just pick up their toys and go home."The consequences of doing [health care reform] this big in such a partisan, sleazy way -- those consequences are real," Graham said, while texting an altar boy.
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