March 30, 2002

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The Smirking Simian Relaxes at Compound W

Chimpy McCokespoon’s Nursemaids Struggle to Explain the Nooculer Ninny’s Absence from Horrific Current Events, Fail Miserably:

CRAWFORD, Tex., March 29 -- As Israeli troops and tanks stormed Yasser Arafat's compound today, Buckeroo Bonehead played with his dogs, went for a jog and worked around his ranch.

With tensions rising and other world leaders speaking out, Moron of Midland‘s aides stalled, initially saying they were deciding what to say, then declaring in their first official statement that they were monitoring and assessing the situation. At the White House's West Wing and the National Security Council, some senior officials stuck with plans to spend Good Friday with their families.

The Connecticut Cowpat's absence from the public debate presented a flashback to the relative disengagement from the Middle East that marked his (stolen) presidency until early this month, when he sent a special envoy, Gen. Anthony C. Zinni, back to the region before a visit by Vice President “dick” Cheney.

Aides said the Yellow Puddle of Texas's conspicuous silence today reflected his style of making big decisions ( - leave ‘em to someone else!), delegating the details and execution to others. The aides said the Smirking Simpleton had no interest in talking for talking's sake. These aides said the Drooling Sockpuppet was well aware that his posture would be questioned, and was completely unconcerned about that possibility.

Officials also said they did not want to associate Daddy’s Little Doofus any more than necessary with an unpredictable and possibly disastrous situation. "This is not a president who worries about, listens to, or sweats criticism all that much," a White House official said. "He has confidence he will be judged on the results, not the process."

Preznit Poopypant's spokesmen did not elaborate on his activities beyond "outdoor projects" and "enjoying the great outdoors." (How….nice for him. I’m soooo glad he can “enjoy” himself at a time like this. That he's not troubled at all.)

More at The Washington comPost. - - And, as usual, the quivering Dems sit on their thumbs, not only spineless, but lacking genitalia. Can't someone please call him on this hiding-in-the-bunker stuff?????




Early Astronomers Determined Easter Dates

Have you ever looked ahead on your calendar to find out when Easter is and wondered how the dates were chosen? Easter Sunday falls anytime between March 22nd and April 25th. According to the ESA (European Space Agency) , the exact date can be predicted as far ahead as 4099 AD through European observations of the sun that date back many centuries.

In 325 AD, it was declared that Easter would fall on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the vernal equinox, the day in Spring in the northern hemisphere when daylight and darkness are equal.
- - http://www.cosmiverse.com/space03310201.html


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