WTF Is It Now?!?

Hooray, hooray, it's the First of May!
May 1st is the first day of National Masterbation Month, cum one and all to celebrate by participating in a local Masterbate-a-thon near you!

In 1995, Good Vibrations invented National Masturbation Month in protest of the firing of Clinton appointed U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Joycelyn Elders. Elders lost favor in the administration when she responded to questions about safer sex by saying that "Masturbation is something that perhaps should be taught". Elders' statement was both practical and supported by sex-positive sex educators everywhere. The folks at Good Vibrations realized that the conservative factors that booted Elders from office were making sex less safe and fun by making masturbation seem shameful. And what better way to make masturbation more visible and accessible than to give it its own month of fun events and education.

It's also Law Day.

Chimperor Flaciddius issued a proclamation about today’s “holiday,” saying:
“Our Nation is built upon the rule of law and guided by our founding promise of freedom, equality, and justice for all. Law Day is an opportunity to celebrate the Constitution and the laws that protect our rights and liberties and to recognize our responsibility as citizens to uphold the values of a free and just society. Link

Teh funny, he really said that shit with a straight face....heh!
Oh the irony continues, as the Smirktard was on a roll today......he also proclaimed today to be "Loyalty Day" .... kinda warms ya up and makes ya fell all squishy inside, doesn't it? I'm messy wet AND rigidly hard at the same time. Seig friggin Heil, Der Furherer.

Oh yeah, it's also Mission accomplished day, the fourth anniversary of the glorious day when Commander Codpiece dressed up in a G.I. Joe outfit with a sock stuffed by his cock, and strutted around like the pilot he never was before declaring "Mission Accomplished" and a bunch of other triumphant bullshit. To display his support of the troops he used them for a photo op, stopping the U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln just off off the coast of San Diego for an extra day, and ordered that it be turned so that you couldn't see the shoreline in the background of the photos and video footage while he played soldier.













Lookee here at mah package! Mission Accomplished.

Undeniable Liberal