It's the fault of the Intertubes

Another Rethug in trouble with the law? How can that? Sen. Ted "Bridge to Nowhere" Stevens has been indicted by a grand jury in Alaska on seven charges of corruption, etc.:

Republican Sen. Ted Stevens of Alaska was indicted Tuesday on charges that he lied about receiving gifts worth more than $250,000 from an Alaska-based energy company on whose behalf he intervened in Washington.

The indictment says the home improvements provided by Veco and its chief executive officer, Bill Allen, a "personal friend of Stevens," included a new first floor, a new garage, a new first- and second-story wraparound deck, new plumbing and new wiring.

Allen gave Stevens a new 1999 Land Rover worth $44,000 in exchange for $5,000 and Stevens' 1964 Ford Mustang, which was worth less than $20,000 at the time, the indictment charged.

Darth Cheney rubbed his fat slimey hands together with glee and grunted, "This is excellent news for the Republican Party! Now, the media will have to focus on our party instead of Hussein." Senator Jabba McSame could not be reached for comment, as he is still cleaning up the jars of applesauce he broke in a supermarket.