January 22, 2009

Headlines from around teh intarwebs

  • Obama starts reversing Bush policies
    Will start reversing presidential limo over Bush enablers next week.

  • Bird remains found in downed jet's engine
    Human excrement found in downed jet's passenger seats.

  • Fire burns NYC hospital ER
    Patients moved to another NYC hospital ER.

  • The First Couple enjoy "fisting each other"
    Sound waves from evangelicals' heads exploding cause massive flux in the space-time continuum.

  • Former French President surrenders
    Jacques Chirac hospitalised after mauling by his "clinically depressed poodle".

  • New staff find White House in tech Dark Ages
    Comic books, empty liquor bottles in Oval Office sofa cushions.