WTF Is It Now?!?

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Terra Lert Color Today: white, turning to rain later.

Thinking people, rolling their eyes, are saying 'shut the f*ck up with the bullsh!t already':

"We were attacked by a ruthless enemy, who must not have understood America," the Nooculer Nincompoop said in typical remarks this month. "They must have thought we were soft and so incredibly materialistic and self- absorbed that we would not find the will to fight and sacrifice for that which we hold dear. And they have made a huge miscalculation!"
"Tell Karl Rove to cool it," Senator Ernest Hollings, Democrat of South Carolina, chided Secretary of State Colin L. Powell last week at a hearing on Capitol Hill. "I know he's trying to keep the war fires burning until November."

- - - NYTimes - - - (Go, Fritz!!)


Today in History:
1584 Russian czar Ivan IV, or Ivan "The Terrible," died at age 53.
1925 The most violent single tornado in U.S. history, the "Tri-State Tornado," hit Missouri, Indiana, and Illinois, killing 689 people and injuring 13,000.
1931 Schick Inc. marketed the first electric razor.
1950 Wilfredo H. Arevalo, a rancher, saw a disc land at Lago Argentino in southern Argentina while a second hovered above. The landed disc gave off a greenish-blue vapour and 'an intense smell of burning benzene.' Inside a transparent cabin were four 'men' dressed in 'cellophane', working at instruments. They shone a search light on him and took off with a faint hum. Both machines vanished over the Chilean frontier, leaving bluish trails. The grass at the site was found burnt.
- - - Infoplease, Yahoo news, and The Fortean Times
2002 During the Clueless Cowpat's job-growth photo-op in Missouri, stock market plunges 666 points.



"Yup, the needle has snapped off the hypocrisy meter once again" - don't forget to check out 'The Top 10 Conservative Idiots' at the Evil DUers' site!



Drooling Sockpuppet Got Involved in Palestinian-Israeli Conflict due to Arab Arm-Twisting, Noogies, Bitch-Slaps - Otherwise, Just Would've Stonewalled While Playing Video Games Under Oval Office Desk:

REPORT: Crusader Bunnypants was forced to get involved in Middle-Eastern affairs on Arab insistence as a condition for support for his plans against Iraq. Official sources were on Sunday quoted as saying "If Bush were to allow the escalating combat between the Israelis and the Palestinians to explode into a full-blown war that sucks in neighbouring states and inflames the Arab world, America's campaign against terror wouldn't get much further than the caves of Afghanistan."
-- -- The Hindustan Times, India; courtesy of BuzzFlash -- (thanks, Gloria!)



rode a tank, held a general's rank...

''Why are we rattling the cage so much?'' asked Sen. Pat Roberts. He was stunned by the Yale YoYo's remarkable Wednesday news conference, which included threats of imminent attack against Iraq and did not rule out using tactical nuclear weapons. As a senior GOP member of the Emerging Threats and Capabilities subcommittee, Roberts knows of no change in Saddam Hussein's ilitary posture to warrant the president's stance. ''I have a lot of questions.,''
Roberts is not alone, though few other senators dare speak out. One who does is Sen. Chuck Hagel of Nebraska, another conservative Republican and a veteran of combat in Vietnam. As a Senate Foreign Relations Committee member, he has listened to foreign leaders alarmed by the Moron of Midland's comments. ''This kind of rhetoric, I think, is dangerous,'' Hagel told me, ''because it does put us in a position where you have to take action or you're going to look like you're bluffing and lose your credibility.''
- - - - more at the Chicago Sun-Times

Not a problem, he just has to stall on this till the November elections. By then I'm sure one of his handlers will come up with something. Meanwhile, that gives us all plenty of time to build 'n' stock our bomb-shelters.



In Other News:

Bush: "We Will Reduce the Nucular Arsenal"
"But not the nuclear arsenal," an aide clarifies.

Norton Predicts Drilling in Alaska Will Create 700,000 Jobs
100 to drill for oil, 699,900 to bury the caribou.

Mugabe Wins in Zimbabwe
Credits victory to whistle-stop campaign of terror.

- - - - The Ironic Times