WTF Is It Now?!?

I'm crabby today.


This Day on Planet Earth

1848 250 people die in a bridge collapse in Yarmouth, England. They had gathered on the suspension bridge to watch a clown boat be pulled by a flock of geese

1912 the RMS Titanic set sail from Southampton, England and into history.

1847 American newspaperman Joseph Pulitzer was born in Mako, Hungary. What was he doing there??

1932 German president Paul Von Hindenburg was re-elected, with Adolf Hitler coming in second. Idontknow came in third.

1952 50 years ago, the MGM movie musical "Singin' in the Rain," starring Gene Kelly, was first released. One of my favorites. Moses supposes his toeses are roses, but Moses supposes erroneously...

1963 the nuclear-powered submarine USS Thresher crapped out off Cape Cod, Mass., in a disaster that claimed 129 lives. The first National Geographic I ever saw had pictures of the Thresher lying on the ocean floor - scared the bejeezus out of me. I was too young to realize it had been an accident - I thought somebody had sunk it in an act of war.

1992 Sam Kinison was killed in a car crash outside Needles, Calif., at age 38.

2002 Dissing the Mid-East by sending Powell on a round-about tour*, and dissing the UK by skipping the Queen Mum's funeral, Crusader Bunnypants, professional xenophobe and uncaring dipwad, stayed safe at home and played with his baseball cards.


Sharon gets put on Chimpy's "I hate you!" list:

Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon is openly defying the Impotent Impotus's decree that he withdraw troops from Palestinian areas. Squinty McPretzal, who first made the demand on Thursday, said Saturday that it must be done ''without delay.'' And he meant it, dammit! He means what he says! So Sharon just better do it! He phoned Mr Sharon later that day to deliver the message personally, pleading with him not to make him look bad in front of all those people. Secretary of State Colin Powell called Sharon on Sunday to repeat the message, just in case Sharon was laughing too hard during the previous call by Preznit Poopypants to understand that the Nooculer Nincompoop was serious, dammit.

The refusal of such a strong U.S. ally to comply with the Ignorant Impotentate's wishes could represent a setback for Chimpy McGameboy's "authority and prestige", ** not just in the Middle East but around the globe. Senior bush handlers made it clear that the Tinhorn 'Texan' was irritated by Sharon's initial response. Peeved, even. Don't these people understand he has high poll numbers***??

'' 'Without delay' means without delay. It means now,'' national security adviser Condoleezza Rice bitched Sunday on CNN's Late Edition, putting the entire world on notice that somebody's getting cranky.**** (culled from Yahoo News)


Why do they hate America?

Members of an Israeli tank brigade waging an offensive in the West Bank found a unique way to show how they felt about the U.S. "president" -- they adopted a stray dog and named it "George W. Bush".

"He's a cowboy," one soldier said as the brown pitbull terrier prowled an Israeli hilltop encampment overlooking the city of Nablus.
"He barks a lot," said a second.
"But he's useless," another chimed in.

LOL. The Moron of Midland's ever more strident demands for an end to Israel's military campaign has struck a sour note among army commanders and their troops -- a reflection of growing resentment among the Israeli public as a whole. "WTF? Who died and left him king?" said Commander Shimon Ben Garblat, head of Israeli forces in the eastern part of Yipsiva. "What nerve! I mean, isn't he pretty much an unelected fraud anyway?". The soldiers then watched as their new pet was vigorously mounted by a beagle named "Exxonmobil".

(Yahoo News. Mostly.)


The Party of Honor and Integrity

The executive director of Virginia's Repuglican Party was indicted Tuesday on charges of illegally intercepting telephone conference calls involving Gov. Mark Warner and other Democrats. Edmund A. Matricardi III, 33, was charged with two counts of illegal wire interception and two counts of attempting to use the contents. He was
released without bail. He could get up to 12 years in prison.

"We have an additional concern and that's the ethical one," said Betty Jolly, executive director of the Democratic Party of Virginia. "We're still waiting for the Republican leadership to condemn this action. Mr. Matricardi did this for his employers, and his employers haven't condemned it."

- - Well, gee, that's no surprise. Bill Bennett has prolly already given his blessing to the whole thing. I mean after all, it was against those Godless Democrats. (story from ABCNews)


Why do they hate America? - part II:

Poor, poor Colin Powell. The leaders of Morocco, Saudi Arabia, and Egypt in the past two days have refused Powell's call for them to speak out against suicide bombers and other forms of violence against Israel, and have declined to embrace any new peace plan without the active involvement of Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat.

In Washington yesterday, US officials seethed at the rebuffs to Powell, not all of which are coming from overseas. Turns out repuke loudmouths William Kristol and Robert Kagan sent a memo to the White House and to reporters saying Powell's trip "was shaping up to be a disaster."

A Western diplomat in Israel suggested that Powell may be delivering a tough message to Arafat. "You've seen what Bush said about Arafat; the administration is pretty fed up," said the diplomat, speaking on condition of anonymity. "I see them giving him one last chance, but mainly because they don't know what comes next."

I feel better already.

Last Thursday, in speaking about Arafat, the Clueless Cowpoker said, "The situation in which he finds himself today is largely of his own making. He's missed his opportunities and thereby betrayed the hopes of the people he's supposed to lead." He never noticed the irony in his statement.

- - Read more at The Boston Globe


Joe Conason kicks hypocritical repuke butt!

If there is anything that modern conservatives hate more than fair taxation, it's a fair fight. The moment they encounter an equally aggressive opponent on a level field, the instinct of these bullying boys and girls is to run and hide and whine.

That's why the Republican leadership, confronted by Paul Begala and James Carville on CNN's revamped Crossfire, are now loudly whispering about a boycott of the show. Those quiet directives emanating from the offices of the Republican National Committee, the Senate Minority Leader's office and other outposts of the right-wing establishment in Washington--leaked in order to intimidate the liberal Crossfire hosts and their network bosses--are a disgrace to the American ideal of free debate.

What makes the sniveling about Crossfire sound even more pitiful is its hypocrisy. If Mr. Carville or Mr. Begala don't always behave as if they're hosting a Georgetown dinner party, they are considerably more civilized than many icons of conservative broadcasting, which long ago abandoned the genteel erudition of Bill Buckley. Rush Limbaugh became a Republican hero while mocking the appearance of the Democratic President's 12-year-old daughter. Ann Coulter only prospered by comparing that same President's wife to a prostitute on national television. Don Imus has broadcast ugly racist "jokes" for years, but politicians of both parties (and journalists of
various persuasions) line up for his show.

Mr. Carville, by contrast, was too polite to mention that his April Fool's Day sparring partner on Crossfire, Republican National Committee chairman Marc Racicot, was until quite recently a lobbyist for Enron. He probably didn't want to make his guest cry.

- - Read it all at The New York Observer !


Quotes of the Day:

"Whenever the going gets tough, we can always count on Trent Lott to open up a few cans of dumbass." - Isaac Peterson, at SmirkingChimp.com

"Bush & Co. are only trying to get Israel to stop murdering and terrorizing Palestinians so they can invade Iraq - a country that even the CIA admits had nothing to do with September 11 - and keep alive the phony War on Terrorism, which should really be called the Republican Ticket to Stay in Office." - Jackson Thoreau, at
AmericaHeldHostile.com

"Bush is learning the hard way-and a lot of people are paying the price for it-that the world is more complicated than what they teach in evangelical Bible class. The world is actually more akin to how they explained it while Bush was at Yale, when he wasn't paying attention, out boozing it up and getting bad grades." - Michelangelo Signorile, at The New York Press. D'oh!

"If you're a member of the Bush administration, interested only in what's best for the oil and gas industry, you simply ignore the facts -- and order up another instant study that agrees with your preconceived notions." - Bill Press, at CNN.com

The Senate has already confirmed 42 nominations during the Shrub's term. That's got to be more than the entire 8 years during the Clinton administration. Take your ultra-right wingnut facist conservative serpent-handling judges and shove 'em!" - mtman135, on the Yahoo message boards


They really did kill Kenny -

South Park's Kenny is gone for good, says co-creator Matt Stone.

After almost 80 episodes in which he has been crushed by rocks, eaten by rats and run over by a bulldozer, Kenny died of a terminal muscular disease in the Dec. 5 episode, Comedy Central officials say. "It was the one episode where (all the characters) cared (he was dying) for once," says Stone, who co-created the series with Trey Parker. "After that, we said, 'Why doesn't he just stay dead?' And it was like, 'OK, let's just do that.' It was that easy of a decision."

Another nail in his coffin: "We got sick of figuring out ways to kill him," Stone says. (from Slate.com)


Kiss dignity and integrity goodbye - Bob Woodward straps on the kneepads, lubes up, bends over and squeals like a pig:

Bob "repuke lapdog" Woodward, during his keynote speach at Business Expo 2002, spent almost an hour singing the praises of Preznit Goober. Seems as if prior to the Sept. 11 attacks, "bob" was planning to write a book about Chimpy McCokespoon's first year in office. He finally caught up with the Cretin of Crawford at a Connecticut university where the Squinting Sockpuppet was 'speaking'.

Woodward was waiting offstage quivering when the AWOL Wonderbunny bounded toward him, "filled with enthusiasm and adrenaline".*****

When the swooning has-been extended his hand and introduced himself, Preznit Dumbass yipped: "Duhh! I know who you are." A moment later, the Connecticut Cowabuser squeezed Woodward's head and called him "Woody."
- Ahhhhh: a true Churchillian statesman. (seen at thedrudgereport)


What F*cking Nerve - House Democrats Shut Out of Security Briefing as Condo Schedules Repuglican-Only Gathering

House Democrats complained to the White House this morning that they were excluded from a briefing scheduled for this afternoon by National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice to House repuglican leaders.

Word of Rice's briefing to the House GOP circlejerk came as the White House moved to restore resident bush's regular meeting with the top two Democrats and repukes in Congress. Today was the sixth week in a row that there was no breakfast meeting for the leaders, but WH spokes-tool Ari "the liar" Fleischer said today that there would be a breakfast meeting Thursday. Today, Daddy's Little Doofus met with GOP "leaders" to discuss "his" "agenda".

- Useless but maddenning blurb from the Washington comPost, thanks to BuzzFlash


*He's in Spain!!!
**Stop it, you're killing me!
***Among morons, anyway
****Fucking with a lunatic is muy dangerous. Unless you can beat the crap out of him.
*****And maybe the contents of a bottle of "pretzals".

Pics: Monday, "Balance and Tranquility" ©  ImageState; Tuesday, "Cuidad en la Cielo", © ML Walker; today, "Moon Rise Over Point Montara Lighthouse, California" ©  Larry Carver