January 6, 2004

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Army trying to keep troops from leaving
The Army is planning to inform soldiers due to return from Iraq and Afghanistan over the next several months that they will not be allowed to retire or otherwise leave the service for 90 days after they return to their home base.

"They're getting offed faster than we can find folks stupid enough to replace 'em!" said an official.

Fretards calling for court-martials, summary executions for the ungrateful traitors in 3... 2...1...


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