September 30, 2007
Because attacking Iraq worked out so effing well...
A new group of "deep-pocketed" neocon goons sets its sights on attacking Iran:
Founded this summer by a dozen wealthy conservatives, the nonprofit group ["Freedom's Watch" -- because if you don't, you must be a Islamodefeatosurrendercrap who hates America, commie] is set apart from most advocacy groups by the immense wealth of its core group of benefactors, its intention to far outspend its rivals and its ambition to pursue a wide-ranging agenda. Its next target: Iran policy.The so-called "experts"? Members -- ahem -- of the American Enterprise Institute, the very same cabal of Cheney-slobbering yamholes who brought us the Iraq war.
Next month, Freedom’s Watch will sponsor a private forum of 20 experts on radical Islam that is expected to make the case that Iran poses a direct threat to the security of the United States.
Bonus: already self-Godwinned by the organization's president, former deputy assistant to Chimpy McStupid, Bradley Blakeman.
September 29, 2007
Sycophant savior
"Petraeus demonstrated that he is a political general of the worst kind" -- traitorous, troop-hating Demoncraps? MoveOn.org? Adm. Fallon, who called him an "ass-kissing little chickenshit"? No, its from the American Conservative:
The general’s relationships with official Washington remain intact. Yet he has broken faith with the soldiers he commands and the Army to which he has devoted his life. He has failed his country. History will not judge him kindly.
Rewritin' history
Around blogtopia
y!sctp!
No credibility and practically a national laughingstock: how Fox "News" blew its chance to go beyond preaching to the choir, at Beggars Can Be Choosers.
Letters to deep thinkers, at Sadly, No.
Ten other things that surprise Bill O'Reilly about black people, by the Rude One.
Phony, you pathetic, draft-dodging, impotent junkie?
Dem Rep to introduce a House resolution condemning corpulent hairy-knuckled ball-fondler Rush Limbaugh on Monday. From Greg Sargent at TPM:
I've just learned that Rep. Mark Udall (D-CO) will be introducing a resolution in the House of Representatives on Monday condemning Rush Limbaugh for his "phony soldiers" remark.C'n'L has more.
This is significant because it has the potential to dramatically up the stakes in this fight. If the Democratic leadership allows it to go for a vote, it will force all the Republicans in the House to either vote for it, against it, or skip the vote -- and to pass judgment on the powerful conservative talk show host's contention that troops who don't support President Bush's war policies are "phony soldiers."
It will also potentially present the Dem leadership with a not-so-easy choice. Many people will naturally call on the leadership to allow the resolution to come to a vote, which is not necessarily something the leadership might want, since it could look like a tit-for-tat reso in retaliation for the measure condemning MoveOn. It also is potentially problematic for some in the leadership because there is an internal sentiment that it's not Congress' job to go around denouncing the remarks, however reprehensible, of private citizens.
Sources tell us that there's a lot of interest in this resolution among rank and file Dem House members.
God tol' me to get chocklit
DANA PERINO: The President does not have second thoughts.
Just the one: Ice cream!!
A bird walks into a store...
A friend sent me this yesterday as a gif, but thanks to Dependable Renegade and DeRosa World, we have the clip. It's pretty cute:
A seagull in Scotland has developed the habit of stealing chips from a neighborhood shop.
The seagull waits until the shopkeeper isn't looking, and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos. Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds.
The seagull's shoplifting started early this month when he first swooped into the store in Aberdeen, Scotland, a nd helped himself to a bag of chips. Since then, he's become a regular. He always takes the same type of chips.
Customers have begun paying for the seagull's stolen bags of chips because they think it's so funny.
Every day is 9/11 when I talk to you, dear ♥ ♥
Sweet chocolate Jesus... Remember that ooky time-out America's Terrizm Whore Rudy Guliani took during the NRA speech to yak with his wife? Well, guess what!
Sweet. Wait, there's more:Giuliani also addressed a cell phone call he took from his wife, Judith, last week during his speech to the National Rifle Association...
"And quite honestly, since Sept. 11, most of the time when we get on a plane, we talk to each other and just reaffirm the fact that we love each other," he said.
"Sometimes if I'm in the middle of a very, very sensitive meeting, I don't take the call right then; I wait. But I thought it would be kind of nice if I took it at that point, and I'd done that before in engagements, and I didn't realize it would create any kind of controversy," he said.Gee, I'm sorry, Mr Prime Minister, Mr Premier, I've got to take this 9/11 call from my darling wife... blarrrrfff...
September 28, 2007
Sorry, we don't speak jive
Top GOP hopefuls avoid minority-issues debate, possibility of being attacked by baggy-pantsed crack-heads shouting for more ice tea, mofos.
Hey, if they're afraid to face black people, how are they going to be able to stand up to al Qaeda?
Jebus...
"I'd like to help you out there, Tim, but I'm a fucking JEW."
At this week's Dartmouth debate, moderator Tim Russert asked the Democratic candidates important, Constitutional, issue-driven questions like "What is your favorite Bible verse?"
Timmeh! Stupid gpuke-ballgargling cocksucker.
Supporting the troops, chickenhawk junkie style
Bestial draft dodger and subhuman, autofellating wankrag Rush Limpbaugh is thankfully getting blasted for his hateful "phony soldiers" comment --
When someone like Rush Limbaugh says that soldiers who disagree with the failed strategies of Bush, Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld are "phony soldiers," you have to consider the source.That's right: picking his ass!
Rush Limbaugh, who, in January, called Vietnam veteran Senator Chuck Hagel "Senator Betrayus" for disagreeing with [that AWOL sack of bad meat in the WH], has made no secret of his disdain for those who serve and speak out. Where was Rush Limbaugh when it came time to serve his country?
What's more, where was Limbaugh's outrage when Max Cleland, a Senator who left three of his limbs in Vietnam was smeared on television? Where was Limbaugh when Senator John Kerry's service was called into question in the form of millions of dollars in campaign ads?Wanking off to posters of Ronald Reagan and to thoughts of getting fist-humped by Tom DeLay in a hot-tub. Or picturing himself rubbing the sweat off Dick Cheney's flabby, scarred manboobs.
Next: Congress votes on a resolution to condemn the destestable jerkwad and ... ha ha! Who am I kidding?! Pussies.
Well, I guess he showed us
Self-hating, so-not-gay gay senator Larry Craig, back in the Senate, votes against a hate-crimes bill that would protect homosexuals.
"Hi there! Told you I wasn't gay!"
Worst... president... evar
John Edwards: "don't get me started on that f*cking disastermonkey"
CNN's CANDY CROWLEY: Has George Bush accomplished anything in office that you approve of?
EDWARDS: That takes a little thinking. {tick... tick... tick...}
{tick... tick... tick...}
He has raised the amount of money that America is contributing to the global fight on AIDS. He has talked about global poverty. I don't think he has done nearly enough, but he has raised it as a serious issue.
I think those are the two things that come to mind. I mean, I think he has been devastating to America and the world as a president, unprecedented. And I think it is very hard to find good things in a bad batch of bad things.
CROWLEY: A lot of people have said he's the worst president in history. Do you agree?
EDWARDS: He is certainly the worst president in my lifetime, and he could be the worst president in history, yeah.
Frederick of Hollywood helpless w/out script
Thompson stumped on death penalty cases, environmental issue, how many moons orbit the Earth --
Clueless republican savior Saint Fred Reaganson said Thursday he was unaware that a federal judge had ruled last week that lethal injection procedures in his home state were unconstitutional. He was also unaware that the U.S. Supreme Court agreed this week to consider a Kentucky case about whether lethal injection violates the Constitution's ban on cruel and unusual punishment.Bonus: continuing in his efforts to reach out to conservative voters, Thompson dismissed criticism from Focus on the Family's James Dobson by telling him to go piss up a rope.
Earlier this month, Thompson seemed surprised when asked about oil drilling in the Everglades, a major issue in Florida, telling reporters to get off his lawn.
Thompson also drew a blank when asked about efforts by Dribbles McMonkeybrains and the GOP to keep human pancake Terri Schiavo alive, saying he did not remember details of the case that was all over the fucking news 24/7.
"Ehhhhhhh!"
Nutjob: "I'm going to hunt you down. I'm coming to your house."
Crazed, falafel-waving gangsta Bill O'Reilly blows another critical o-ring, announces on air that "if I could strangle these people and not go to hell and get executed ... I would."
Another bloodthirsty, violent threat by a rightwingnut ... what's with these compassionate conservatives?
"Wehhhhhh!"
Sovereignity, American Style
Sovereign means...um..freedom...and uhhh OUR senate will decide whats best for our newest colony
Implicitly criticizing the Bush administration's reliance on the Iraqi central government to unify the country, the U.S. Senate on Wednesday overwhelmingly endorsed the decentralization of Iraq into semi-autonomous regions. The nonbinding measure sponsored by Sen. Joseph R. Biden Jr. (D-Del.) -- which supports a "federal system" that would divide Iraq into sectarian-dominated regions -- won unusually broad bipartisan support, passing 75 to 23.Doesn't OUR senate have better things to do? Fuck, they can't do anything good for OUR country, why in hell would they think about running somebody else's? Wow. Fucking Wow. And Arabs in the Middle East pretty much say the same thing...
"Instead of calling for division, the causes that led to the current situation should be addressed. These include the (US-led) occupation, the sectarian and ethnic quota system, absence of law and security and the paralyzed administration," he said.Ouch, THAT'S going to leave a mark.
September 27, 2007
News quiz
The following: "The intention is to smear an individual without any basis in reality, without any fairness, in an attempt to make that person demonized so that they will not be listened to" is a quote by
a. John Kerry
b. Hillary Clinton
c. Al Gore
d. Fox News cuntributor Tammy Bruce, on the "media Gestapo" "going after" poor, poor misunderstood homey Bill O'Reilly.
Nobuddy wantsta be a war preznit
Ceptin' this guy. As Congress debates passing an additional $190 billion on top of the previous billions we've already spent on the war, a transcript surfaces showing Awol von Retard rejected an offer from Saddam to leave voluntarily if he was allowed to keep $1 billion of his own money. And it was even written phonetically.
Saddam Hussein was prepared to take $1 billion and go into exile before the Iraq war, according to a transcript of talks between Bush and the Spanish Prime Minister.Sigh.
During a meeting in Crawford on February 22, 2003, Bush told Jose Maria Aznar that Saddam could also be assassinated, according to the transcript.
"Saddam Hussein won't change and he'll keep on playing games. The time has come to get rid of him. That's the way it is," Bush said.
Big Bill: "you have GOT to be fucking kidding me"
Bill Clinton blasts repukes for their hypocritical hissyfit over the MoveOn.org ad, telling Anderson Cooper their "feigned outrage" was completely "disingenuous." Bonus: he did not have to use a phonetic pronunciation guide.
COOPER: Focus on that as opposed to focus on what’s really happening ….Yeah!
CLINTON: Oh yeah. That’s right. “I don’t have to deal with Iraq. I don’t have to tell anybody what I’m going to do. Everything we do in Iraq is obviously right because they said this about Petraeus,” as if it was the only issue in the whole wide world.
Come on, these are the people that ran a television ad in Georgia with Max Cleland, who lost half his body in Vietnam, in the same ad with Osama bin Laden and Saddam Hussein. That’s what Republicans do. And the person that rode into the Senate on that ad was there voting to condemn the Democrats over the Petraeus ad. I mean, these are the people that funded the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth. The President appointed one of the principal funders of the Swift Boat ads to be an ambassador, but they’re really about the Petraeus one. It’s okay to question John Kerry’s patriotism on the blatantly dishonest claims by people that didn’t know what they are talking about. So it was just bait and switch. It was “Oh, thank goodness, I can take this little word here and ignore what we’ve done in Iraq and what we’re gonna do and the outrageous way that we’re gained political power by smearing John Kerry.” Same crowd that smeared John McCain, another war hero, saying he had a black baby, because he adopted a child from Bangladesh.
It's just normal Indiana market-like violence!
The US military said Thursday that a surge in a wave of bombings across Iraq this week that left at least 70 people dead did not signify an upturn in violence during the Muslim holy month of Ramadan.
National up-is-down day on Planet Stupid
Catapulting the propaganda
Miserable little chickenshit demands his own personal knob-gobbler to conduct an NPR interview -- and NPR tells him to fuck off. Which he does, to WH propaganda network Fox News.
The Froomster:
How much control should the White House have over who gets to interview [that snivelling fucking moron] President Bush? Specifically, should [the Dictator-tot] be able to dictate which journalists at which outlets he talks to?TRex at fdl asks "If the President can’t stand up to NPR, how will he stand up to al-Qaeda?" Indeed.
Those are among the questions raised by the White House's recent offer to let National Public Radio analyst Juan Williams interview Bush about race relations -- and NPR management's insistence that they should get to choose who conducted the interview.
The end result: Williams did the interview for his other employer -- Fox News.
Given how meticulously the White House picks and grooms Bush's audiences to avoid any unpleasantness, it should come as no surprise that the press office is very careful about who gets to interview Bush. It's certainly no secret that Bush has his favorite interlocutors. (Fox News host Neil Cavuto comes to mind.) And he habitually avoids potentially contentious sit-down interviews with journalists -- and entire news organizations, for that matter -- known for their accountability reporting.
In other not-news, wHoward Kurtz is still a flaming douchebag.
September 26, 2007
Iz r childrin lerning?
"Childrens do learn." -- yore preznit, at a No Child Left Behind photo-op, 9/26/07.
Not taken out of context.
LOL. Fucking dumbass. 
Durrrrr!
Craig to judge: "I blew it"
Gay rethug Sen. Larry Craig tries to wipe away the stain of his guilty plea in an airport bathroom gay sex case. "I just wasn't thinking straight," he tells judge.
"Judge? Hi! I'm not gay!"
No more ice tea, motherf*cker!!!!!!
Champion gasbag, falafel abuser and minority activist Bill O'Reilly goes ballistic on a call to CNN, "screams at the top of his lungs for a very long period of time," threatens to cut off their mic.
See also:
O'Reilly admits black-owned restaurant was actually "Hip deep in crack dealers screaming 'Where my iced tea be at?'"
Bill O'Reilly attends first football game, surprised to find there were no guns on the field.
"As a last resort"
Bush promised he would invade Iraq, whether or not Saddam complied with UN weapons inspectors.
Lessee... weppins a' mass distrucshun. Naw, smoking mushroom clouds. Fightin' 'em over there. Naw, killin' his own people. Uhhh, democritude! Naw, wepp... umm, 'cause I want tuh!
El Pais, the highest-circulation daily in Spain, today published what it said was the transcript of a private talk between Bush and Spanish Prime Minister Jose Maria Aznar on February 22, 2003, concerning the coming U.S. invasion of Iraq.He also threatened nations with retaliation if they did not vote for a UN resolution backing the war. Integrity.
The conversation took place at Bunnypants' blazing hellhole in Crawford, Texas. The confidential transcript was prepared by Spain's ambassador to the United States, the paper reported.
Bush purportedly said he planned to invade Iraq in March "if there was a United Nations Security Council resolution or not... We have to get rid of Saddam. We will be in Baghdad at the end of March."
Kicking WHOSE ass, jerkoff?
More like this, please: Democratic Rep. John Yarmuth rips Awol McBubbles a new one --
With brave American soldiers dying in record numbers, I have two questions for the President — just whose posteriors are we kicking and how do you know?C 'n' L has the video.
With Sunnis and Shiites killing themselves and each other, plus an incompetence Maliki government, we don’t know who we’re fighting, much less where we’re kicking them. And while we’re tied up in Iraq, Al Qaeda thrives in Pakistan and Afghanistan. So the President’s turn of phrase will go to the blooper hall of fame with other Bush Golden Oldies like last throes, links to Al Qaeda and Mission Accomplished.
There was a time when America’s success meant defeating Nazis, tearing down communism’s Iron Curtain and walking on the moon. Supporting our troops meant honest safeguards, not trash talk. How low have our standards fallen when the President points to the debacle he created and says, this is what I’m proud of. Most Americans believe in a country that’s capable of much higher standards, and if America were really “kicking butt,” the President wouldn’t need to say anything, every one would know it.
That's pronounced "dum ass"
Another proud moment in American history.
Iz r childrin lerning?How do you keep a leader as gaffe-prone as George aWol McDumbass from making even more slips of the tongue?
When Bush addressed the U.N. General Assembly on Tuesday, the White House inadvertently showed exactly how -- with a phonetic pronunciation guide on the teleprompter to get him past troublesome names of countries and world leaders.
The White House was left scrambling to explain after a marked-up draft of Bush's speech popped up briefly on the U.N. website as he delivered his remarks, giving a rare glimpse of the special guidance he gets for major addresses.
It included phonetic spellings for French President Nicolas Sarkozy, a friend, and Zimbabwe leader Robert Mugabe. Pronunciations were also provided for Kyrgyzstan, Mauritania and the Zimbabwe capital Harare; assembly, United and Nations.
New Iraq Progress Report
Astonishing signs of normalcy and amazing Progress:
Civil war has been averted in Iraq and Iranian intervention there has “ceased to exist,” Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki said yesterday.Fan-sergifucking-tastic. So it's time to bring the troops home, right? Uhhh no. So what will next week’s American casualties have died for? Duh. al Qaeda. Again.
Lather, rinse, repeat....repeatedly. And why aren’t we condemning Saudi Arabia for funneling all that money to the Sunni insurgents? They are killing Americans too. Just because Saudi Arabia didn’t actually give them the weapons, they are still guilty by giving them the money to buy weapons.
Update: Even More Progress
Iraq was on Wednesday rocked by powerful car and suicide bombings that killed 28 people, bringing the toll in a three-day surge of bloodletting across the country to about 70, officials said.So, you see, since we were expecting it, it's a sign we're kickin' ass!!
"There was an increase in violence in the past few days," US military spokesman Major General Kevin Bergner told reporters in Baghdad. "We had been expecting it."
Bonus Progress Report: The Cheney Menstruation is requesting $190 billion MORE from Congress, which will make 2008 'The Most Expensive Year of the War.'
All 9-11 All The Time
If the next election becomes Hillary vs. Newt, count me out.
And if when Rudy steals the election, according to big box blog Eschaton:
*We can rename apple pie as "9/11 pie" and apple pie a la mode as "9/11 pie with a side of Iraqi freedom."
*We can mint a special coin worth exactly $9.11.
*We can go to a 9-11 game and have a ballpark 9-11 hot dog.*Independence Day will be moved to 9/11. And there will be fireworks!
*Every year we can sing 9/11 carols around the 9/11 tree.
I'm sure you can add more....
Hi! I'm Marsha Blackburn, World-Class Asshole and All-Around Twat.
UPDATED: Sorry this is a repost... I think it bares repeating, though.
Adventures in Modern Republicanism, Vol 1.
I.. ahh... err.. Moveon! 9/11... uhhh... Moveon... ahh... I love america!!!1!111!!
So fake these fuckers should be sold in bulk on Canal Street.
JasonC
September 25, 2007
Keepin' us safer
Violent crime a sticky issue for the White House as more and more people want to grab that miserable little fucker in his Oval Orifice and repeatedly ram his stupid monkey face into a clogged and running toilet, study shows.
Violent crime in the United States rose more than previously believed in 2006, continuing the most significant increase in more than a decade, according to an FBI report released yesterday.
Newtered!!
Oh Yeah! If Newt Gingrich can raise $30 million in the next three weeks, he'll hop in the presidential race seeking the Republican nomination.
Perhaps Newter thinks his marital history won't matter. Why even bother examining his political record, let's take a look at his almighty family values:
In 1981, Newt dumped his first wife, Jackie Battley, for Marianne, wife number 2, while Jackie was in the hospital undergoing cancer treatment. Marianne and Newt divorced in December, 1999 after Marianne found out about Newt's long-running affair with Callista Bisek, his one-time congressional aide.
"In May 1999, however, Gingrich called Marianne at her mother's home. After wishing the 84-year-old matriarch happy birthday, he told Marianne that he wanted a divorce."
Newt, then age 57 and Callista, age 34, were married in a private ceremony in a hotel courtyard in Alexandria, Va. in August, 2000.
Extra Double Bonus: Newt has admitted having an extra-marital affair during the Clinton impeachment proceedings.
Laaaaand of the free... and the home of the braaaaave...
Doing the people's business, instead of wasting time with political posturing and ... what? Oh.
Rep. Duncan Hunter (R-Caca) said that if Columbia University President Lee Bollinger “follows through with this hosting of the leader of Iran, I will move in Congress to cut off every single type of federal funding to Columbia University.”Why does Rep. Hunter hate freedom, college?
Appearing on Fox News after the speech by Ahmawajinamanadad, Hunter said that he plans to follow through on his threat and will now “initiate legislation, and try to get as many people as can see it my way, to cut off funds to Columbia University.”
Where its 9/11 9/11 9/11 all the time
America's 9/11 September 11th Mayor 9/11 Rudy "9/11" Giuliani 9/11 upcoming 9/11 campaign event to 9/11 charge $9.11 for attendance. Because without the 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 you might remember he's just a a gay-loving, baby-killing , gun-hating, cross-dressing man-whore. 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 
Romney campaign tainted by Blackwater affair, Mitt Romney
Serial flipflopper Multiple-Choice Mitt is "withholding comment" on the massacre of innocent Iraqi civilians by guards working for one of his top advisers.
Gingrich: Skipping black forum a mistake
May lose the GOP their one black voter
Slovenly know-it-all Newt Gingrich urged the leading rethuglican candidates Tuesday to reconsider their decision not to participate in a forum on Thursday moderated by talk show host Tavis Smiley and aired by PBS.
"I'm puzzled by their decision. I can't speak for them. I think it's a mistake," the serial adulterer said, adding "I don't know what the candidates are afraid of. It's not like anybody's going to stand up and shout 'more ice tea, motherfucker."
Violation of the public trust, bitch??
MSNBC guest host to repuke: “When was the last time a New York Times ad ever killed somebody?”
Left unspoken: "cunt!" Fuc Tucker Carlson substitute host David Shuster destroys hypocrite and Republican Rep (but I repeat myself) Marsha Blackburn as she glibly recites her talking points on the MoveOn/NYT Petraeus ad ... but can't name the last soldier from her district to be killed in Iraq:
Shuster: "Let’s talk about the public trust. You represent, of course, a district in western Tennessee. What was the name of the last solider from your district who was killed in Iraq?"
Blackburn:"The name of the last soldier killed in Iraq - uh - from my district I - I do not know his name -"
Shuster: "Ok, his name was Jeremy Bohannon, he was killed August the 9th, 2007. How come you didn’t know the name?"
Blackburn: "I - I, you know, I - I do not know why I did not know the name..."
Shuster: "But you weren’t appreciative enough to know the name of this young man, he was 18 years old who was killed, and yet you can say chapter and verse about what’s going on with the New York Times and Move On.org." {..snip..}
Shuster: “But don’t you understand, the problems that a lot of people would have, that you’re so focused on an ad — when was the last time a New York Times ad ever killed somebody? I mean, here we have a war that took the life of an 18 year old kid, Jeremy Bohannon from your district, and you didn’t even know his name.”
Left Wing Smear Site Betrays America
To the fainting couch! Your Reich-Wing moment of teh vapahs© de jour:
The Evil, Great Orange Satan: 45% Want Ahmadinejad As US President. It gets even worse, someSee! We told yah. Libruls r Traterz, nananananaaaaahhh!!womanliberal slut posted a diary on how she has a slight crush on Ahmedinijad.
Holdon, My wife is calling...
Serial aldulterer and cell-phone prop using Republicunt presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani seems to have declared himself King of Nato
Rudy Giuliani talked tough on Iran yesterday, proposing to expand NATO to include Israel and warning that if Iran's leaders go ahead with their goal to be a nuclear power "we will prevent it, or we will set them back five or 10 years." . . . .He is going to admit Israel to the North Atlantic Treaty Association? Many times, the question is asked, “could we possibly have a worse president?”
The answer, sadly, is “yes.”
Giuliani: Bush on steroids
September 24, 2007
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