January 31, 2007

Smirky McGameboy gets new toy, almost bulldozes the press
Shades of Frank Burns...

The president clambered into the driver's seat of Caterpillar's giant D10 tractor. "I would suggest moving back...I'm about to crank this sucker up," he was reported as saying.

But as White House staff started to move the press corps back, the situation became more chaotic. Newsweek reporter Holly Bailey writes that "the tractor lurched forward" and White House staff "too were forced to scramble for safety. "Get out of the way!" a news photographer yelled. "I think he might run us over!""
Fun fact: 'White House adviser Karl Rove asked Caterpillar executives to give the president a photo opportunity in the tractor.'

Be afraid... be very afraid...
James Webb's response to the idiot's SoTfU sent shockwaves of fear through conservative America.

The white stuff at one end is dandelion
Lawn pecker seen from space.

Shameless beyond belief
Holy Joe and Saint John shield Jebus McBubble-Boy.

To save Bush from embarrassing Senate rejections, McCain, Graham toil at sinking the resolutions to halt the murderous escalations. Lieberman joins with those who would put more soldiers in the line of fire in order to save Bush's sorry ass... All three are signers of the death warrant for our GIs and continue to support a chronic loser. It's like giving an alcoholic ten drinks and then handing him the keys to the car and pointing him in the direction of busy pedestrian mall. That's what these senators are doing with Bush and Cheney. McCain keeps stripping away his integrity like an aging lap dancer.
- headline at BuzzFlash.

Funeral home uses dead critters to cheer guests
A funeral home in Madison, Wisconsin uses dead stuffed animals to cheer patrons and their children. Tableaus include stiff stuffed squirrels drinking at a bar watching other squirrels pole-dance topless, a dead badger throwing a football, quail and mallards shooting at a target that resembles Dick Cheney, and "other ex-rodents enjoying a carousel ride."

Obama shuns gpuke propaganda channel
"This is huge!" - hyperventilating Faux Nooze host/douchebag Steve "douchie" Doocy.

Senator/possible islamomenace B. Hussein Obama has "frozen out" Fox News in the wake of the network's "major screw-up in running with the erroneous Obama-the-jihadist story reported by [the Moonie Times'] Insight magazine."

A source at the Nothing channel said that "Obama and his staff are in for a rude awakening if they think they can write off Fox News."

If a candidate is serious about running for president, he or she is going to need a network like Fox to reach out to all those voters in the red and purple states, the source said.
Yes, we all know how fair and balanced Fox is with voter outreach.

Fun fact: "What Insight did on its web site, and what Fox News did in repeating the report, was not ideological at all. It was unethical, unprofessional and shabby, a trifecta, if you will, in the world of journalism." - an editorial from the conservative Chicago Trib.

F*ck police training! Pool partay!!

Millions in Iraq reconstruction aid wasted, investigators say. Like on 'luxury trailers' and an Olympic-size swimming pool.

Tens of millions of dollars have been wasted in Iraq reconstruction aid, some of it on an Olympic-size swimming pool ordered up by Iraqi officials for a police academy that has yet to be used, investigators say.

The quarterly audit by Stuart Bowen Jr., the special inspector general for Iraq reconstruction, is the latest to paint a grim picture of waste, fraud and frustration in an Iraq war and reconstruction effort that has cost taxpayers more than $300 billion.

Fun fact: Bowen's office was "nearly eliminated last month by administration-friendly Republicans in Congress."

Breaking: Cheney's handwritten notes implicate Bush in Plame affair
Copies of handwritten notes by Dick "dick" Cheney, introduced at trial by defense attorneys for former White House staffer Lewis "Scooter" Libby, would appear to implicate George "fucking aWol jerkwad" Bush in the Plame CIA leak case.

Cheney's notes, which were introduced into evidence Tuesday, call into question the truthfulness of [the Liar-in-Chief]'s vehement denials about his prior knowledge of the attacks against Wilson. The revelation that Bush may have known all along that there was an effort by members of his office to discredit the former ambassador begs the question: Was the president also aware that senior members of his administration compromised Valerie Plame's undercover role with the CIA?

Further, the highly explicit nature of Cheney's comments not only hints at a rift between Cheney and Bush over what Cheney felt was the scapegoating of Libby, but also raises serious questions about potentially criminal actions by [Jebus's Fave-rit Preznit]. If Bush did indeed play an active role in encouraging Libby to take the fall to protect Karl Rove, as Libby's lawyers articulated in their opening statements, then that could be viewed as criminal involvement by Bush.
Oh baby. Now can we impeach him? Huh? Huh? How about now?

Miller: Scooooter's a liiiiiiar
Former WH propaganda minister contradicts Libby in perjury case

Ex-NY Times WH stenographer Judy Miller said Lewis "Scooter" Libby spoke to her about CIA operative Valerie Plame on two occasions, before he said he knew her identity. Libby mentioned that Plame worked at the CIA at both meetings, Miller said.

Libby's defence team, remembering that Judy has a hard time remembering much of anything that doesn't directly concern itself with Dick Cheney's jock size, is pressing for details, if she can remember any.

Architect of the 'Bush Doctrine' Paul Wolfowitz, with holes on his socks, is seen as he leaves from a mosque in western Turkey, Sunday, Jan. 28, 2007. (AP Photo/Nadir Alp/Anatolia)

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.us
Clicky for embiggened toe-cheesy goodness.

Actual headline: U.S. may have botched training of Iraqis
Doi!!!! Gee, you think?? Story here.

Iraq Study Group co-chairman James Baker flips off the VP's assertion that we have "completed our objectives" in Iraq.


January 30, 2007

A party of one
:: giggle ::

Joe Lieberman gets a harshly-worded letter - from the official Connecticut for Lieberman Party.

Hillary to Awol von Bunnypants: you broke it, you bought it
Fix what you fucked up, former first lady tells flaming fuckwit.

"This was his decision to go to war with an ill-conceived plan and an incompetently executed strategy,” the Democratic senator from New York said her in initial presidential campaign swing through Iowa.

“We expect him to extricate our country from this before he leaves office” in January 2009, Ms Clinton said.

"I am going to level with you, the president has said this is going to be left to his successor," Clinton said. "I think it is the height of irresponsibility and I really resent it."
The White House replied in typical fashion, saying it was "disappointed" that Clinton was responding to Bush's "new" war "strategy" "with a partisan attack that sends the wrong message to our troops and our enemies."

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.us

Who cares what "the enemy" thinks?

"Has anyone come up with a compelling, legitimate reason as to why terrorists, insurgents, and vaguely-defined enemies should dictate how the United States acts and reacts in the Iraq War? 'Cause, like, now that the word "embolden" has become such a big goddamn part of the talking point vocabulary of war hawks and Lieber-men, it sure seems like we're all supposed to worry what the "enemy" will feel if we don't act the way they think we should act."
- the Rude Pundit.

Dirty fucking hippie cribs found at Stonehenge
Archaeologists say they have found a huge ancient settlement used by the people who built Stonehenge. In ancient times, this settlement would have housed hundreds of people, making it the largest Neolithic village ever found in Britain.

"The animal bones are being thrown away half-eaten. It's what we call a feasting assemblage. This is where they went to party - you could say it was the first free festival."

Fleischer: Scoooooter's a liiiiiiar
Scooter "every man for himself" Libby: "I didn't do it."
Ari "please don't execute me" Fleischer: "Libby did it."

The former presidential spokesman, testifying under a grant of immunity, said that Libby appeared to know that he was passing along sensitive information. "I believe he mentioned her name and said something like, `This is hush-hush, this is on the Q-T, not very many people know this,'" Fleischer said.

Fleischer's testimony appeared to aid the government's attempt to depict Libby as stealthily exchanging information about Plame as part of a campaign to discredit her husband, former Ambassador Joseph Wilson, a critic of the Iraq war.
Next up: Judy Miller, formerly of the NY Times' WH Propaganda Ministry.

GOP Senator: Bush not sole 'decision-maker'
Specter actually, for a minute there, takes a stand on something.

"I would suggest respectfully to the president that he is not the sole decider," Sen. Arlen Specter said during a hearing on Congress' war powers.

"The Constitution makes Congress a coequal branch of government. It's time we start acting like it," said Sen. Russell Feingold, D-Obvious.

"Read the Constitution," Democratic Sen. Barbara Boxer told her colleagues last week. "The Congress has the power to declare war. And on multiple occasions, we used our power to end conflicts."
"Once Congress raises an army, it's his to command," said John Turner, a law professor at the University of Virginia. "Unless you impeach the little fucker."

January 29, 2007

Brrr... must get warm...

The real John McCain
Saint or Ain't? Why he's too angry, too slimy, and too much of a hack to be president.

Just because
Cat Head Theatuh

Broderella gets his period
And it ain't pretty. A Rational Animal explains.

Dick Cheney, new Newsweek interview:

"What's happened here now over the last few weeks is that the president has shored up his position with the speech he made specifically on Iraq."
If by "shored up" you mean the complete fucking opposite, I guess:
The president’s approval ratings are at their lowest point in the poll’s history — 30 percent — and more than half the country say they wish the Bush presidency were simply over, a sentiment that is almost unanimous among Democrats, and is shared by a clear majority of independents and even one in five Republicans. Half of all registered voters would rather see a Democrat elected president in 2008, compared to just 28 percent who’d prefer the GOP to remain in the White House.

Doughy pantload Jonah Goldberg 2/8/05: I'll bet $1,000 that Iraq won't have a civil war, that it will have a viable constitution, and that a majority of Iraqis and Americans will, in two years time, agree that the war was worth it.

Doughy pantload Jonah Goldberg 1/18/07: Shit. OK. I will give money to war-related charities, on my own schedule, so leave me alone! I will not announce it when I do it, which I have never done in the past because it's not anyone's business (even this post is somewhat sickening in that I'm even responding to these gadflies). I can't believe I made this bet. You guys suck.

Emboldening me to kick Lieberman's pasty ass!
Joe Biden, Democratic chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, replies to misadministration officials and their supine minions who suggest that condemning the sending of thousands more troops to their possible deaths would 'embolden the enemy':

"It's not the American people and the United States Congress who are emboldening the enemy," he said. "It's the failed policy of this president, going to war without a strategy, going to war prematurely, going to war without enough troops, going to war without enough equipment and, lastly, now sending 17,500 people in the middle of a city of 6 1/2 million people with bull's-eyes on their back, with no plan."

Dick Cheney: the new 'Baghdad Bob'
Insurgents have increased their attacks in order to influence the US elections.
We're turning another corner.
Things are going remarkably well in Iraq.
We're adapting to win.
I think they're in the last throes, if you will, of the insurgency.
My belief is we will, in fact, be greeted as liberators.
A ruthless dictator cultivated WMDs and the means to deliver them.
He gave support to terrorists and had an established relationship with al Qaeda.
Go f*ck yourself.

And this, from his most recent interview with Wolf Blitzer on CNN:
"We have, in fact, accomplished our objectives."

Brownback: Joe's the one with the 'skidmarks' on his back
Sen. Sam Brownback (R-KS) slammed Joe Lieberman's (R-Bushcock) claims that 'people who oppose escalation in Iraq are emboldening terrorists.'

“I don’t see this enemy as needing any more emboldening or getting it from any resolution. They’re emboldened now,” Brownback said on Fox News. "Now for petessake, Joe, shut your goddamn twathole already. Moron."

President Buh.

January 28, 2007

Well, we're back
The new Blogger, the same old WTF.

Yay. Oh, ummmm, arrrrrr!

On edit: Meh. Not quite. We've lost the ability to keep the older posts first. Which means we'll have to rethink the whole pic of the day thing.

"It’s about whether you believe in freedom"
Isn't it embarrassing being Sean Hannity?

[Autofellating shitbag and total dumbass] Sean Hannity attacked Mesa, Arizona City Councilman Tom Rawles for expressing his “liberal” opposition to the war in Iraq by refusing to stand and recite the Pledge of Allegiance. Only problem? Councilman Rawles has been a Republican for 45 years.

He rudely sighed and made other noises while it was Colmes’ turn to do the interviewing. Then Hannity started his portion of the interview with his taunting, bullyboy belligerence. Hannity waved his papers as he began speaking. “Hey uh, Tom. Hi, Sean Hannity here. You know you say you’re trying to stimulate debate. That’s all we’ve done since the war started. We’ve debated. You liberals don’t like the fact that you’re not in power. You insult the president, you call him a liar everyday. You change your position every day. You have no plan on how to solve the problem in Iraq. You don’t understand the importance of it. This isn’t about stimulating debate. This is about, you know, making yourself look good.”

You could tell from the look on Rawles’ face what he thought of Hannity but was too polite to say. Rawles reiterated that his protest was his way of speaking out and, he thought, encouraging others to debate the issues more vigorously. He added, “By the way, I’m not a liberal. I’ve been a Republican for 45 years.”

“OK,” Hannity snapped. “Whatever, that’s not the point.”
“You have a sense of self-importance,” the self-important gasbag told the councilman. "All your leaders in the Democratic Party are out there insulting our president…"

"Jebus, you drivelling shithead - how many times do I have to tell you I'm a fucking conservative, you stupid numb fuck?" Rawles should have replied.

Seen at the anti-war rally
Pic via Raw Story. More dirty fucking hippies at Mia Culpa.

Give this war a chance
Mortar attack on a Baghdad girls' school kills five, wounds 20.

No-confidence vote
The Bush legacy -

[Smirky McLiar]has lost the greatest commodity a president can possess: The public’s trust.

Scattered with Katrina’s winds and buried in the bloody battlefields of Iraq, his credibility is likely gone forever, which means there will be no political comeback for Bush. His die is cast.

Bush lost the benefit of the doubt after Katrina. He couldn’t explain away the lack of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, the shifting rationales for war or the unmet expectations on the battlefield – even though each event on its own had plausible explanations.

House republicans: "Not fair! You guys suck!"

"It seems," said whiny-ass hypocrite John Boehner, R-Ectum, "over the last three weeks that the more we reach out and offer our hand of bipartisanship, (the more) it is slapped away."

"Members of the current minority sat here for two weeks grinding their teeth while they watched things come to the floor without having gone to committee, without prior debate and discussion," said Rep. Vernon Ehlers, R-Crybaby. "And this is the crowning insult."

"It is tough to be in the minority, isn't it? I feel your pain," Majority Leader Steny Hoyer, D-Md., said.

Cheney's key role in leak case detailed

A former aide testified Thursday that Cheney personally directed the effort to discredit administration critic Joe Wilson by having calls made to reporters in 2003.

Cheney dictated detailed "talking points" for his chief of staff, Scooter Libby, and others on how they could impugn the critic's credibility, said Catherine Martin, who was the vice president's top press aide at the time. Cheney's active role in the campaign to undermine Wilson has been known, but Martin's testimony was the first inside account of the administration's attempts to manage the affair.

Rove, White House spokesman get subpoenas, trots
Grublike svengali Karl Rove and communications director Dan Bartlett have received subpoenas to testify for the defense at the trial of WH fallguy Scooter Libby.

The subpoenas make it clearer than ever that Libby's defense team will seek to put the Bush administration and its policies on trial.

"This is obviously primarily about the guilt or innocence of the defendant," former Deputy Attorney General Eric Holder told ABC News. "But in a larger sense, it's going to be an examination and perhaps even a trial about how this administration has conducted itself on matters of national security and on Iraq, specifically."

Potential witnesses for the government include "Whatever You Say, Mr Vice President!" host Tim "squeee!" Russert; Judith Miller, former WH propaganda minister to the New York Times; and our old friend, former White House press secretary Ari "the Liar" Fleischer.

Libby's witness list is even more impressive, as it includes a sitting - and possibly armed - vice president:
Dick Cheney
Karl Rove
NBC News' Andrea Mitchell
Former deputy secretary of state Richard Armitage
George Tenet, former CIA director
Incontinent traitor Bob Novak
John McLaughlin, director of central intelligence
Stephen Hadley, national security advisor
Washington Post contributor and author of My Life and Times at George Bush's Cock, Bob Woodward

It was also disclosed this week that Cheney wrote a note that Libby's defense argues shows that Libby was a scapegoat.

"Not going to protect one staffer + sacrifice the guy who was asked to stick his neck in the meat grinder," Cheney wrote.

Tens of thousands of demonstrators rally against Bush's war
Tens of thousands of demonstrators now added to the Defense Department's domestic spying 'anti-terrorism' database.

“George Bush has a habit of firing military leaders who tell him the Iraq war is failing,” House Judiciary Committee chairman John Conyers said to the crowd. “He can’t fire you. He can’t fire us."

The protests came on a day when the U.S. military reported the deaths of seven more American soldiers, raising to at least 12 the number of service members killed in the past three days. As protesters streamed to the Mall, Bush reaffirmed his commitment to the troop increase.

At the rally, 12-year-old Moriah Arnold stood on her toes to reach the microphone and tell the crowd: “Now we know our leaders either lied to us or hid the truth. Because of our actions, the rest of the world sees us as a bully and a liar.”
Bu... bu.. but... Clinton! What will we tell our children? That at least Preznit Bush never got a blowjob?

More protest coverage here, here and here.