April 26, 2003

Great moments in television
"I find George Bush to be an embarrassment."

Mike Farrell bitchslaps, leaves for dead, the already decomposing Boob Novak on Crossfire:

NOVAK: Mike Farrell, as we just mentioned the Dixie Chicks and their career was kind of in the tank and because they were attacked by the right, they are moving all the way up to the top of the charts. And some broken down actress named Janeane Garofalo, I'd never heard of, that's has been in this program...

MIKE FARRELL: How do you know she's a broken down actress if you've never heard of her?

NOVAK: I was told that by the staff.

FARRELL: You were told that by some people who would like to have people think that.

NOVAK: Mike, let me finish the question. She said that the other day, that she's almost famous. Isn't this a case of all you left-wing Hollywood types laughing all the way to the bank and all these crocodile tears about being attacked?

FARRELL: Broken down actress and almost famous. You don't understand understatement, Bob, that's clear from the way you approach this show. Janeane was making a comment that had some humor, some ironic humor intended with it. But again, I think it escaped you. Was there a question?

NOVAK: I happen, by accident, for the first time in my life, to watch an episode of "West Wing." That is total liberal propaganda. In fact, everything on -- isn't it?

FARRELL: Somebody tied you to the chair, Bob?

NOVAK: Everything on television is controlled by the left. The entertainment industry is controlled by the left. Isn't that the truth?

FARRELL: No, of course it's not, and everybody knows it's not. Have you watched Fox television lately?

NOVAK: That's an exemption. That's an exemption.

NOVAK: Mike Farrell, I want to put on the screen a couple of polls that were taken by CNN/USA Today/Gallup. "Are there any celebrities whose political opinions would make you more likely to favor their views?" Yes, 11 percent. No, 78 percent. "Are there any celebrities whose political opinions would make you more likely to oppose their views?" Yes, 13 percent. No, 85 percent. You people -- nobody out there is listening to you. Why can't you do your work and shut up?

FARRELL: Then why does it matter to you, Bob? Then why does it matter to you when celebrities exercise their right as citizens -- when celebrities exercise their right to free speech, why does it trouble so you so much, then? If nobody is listening and nobody cares?

NOVAK: I see that you have given a contribution to Howard Dean, the former governor of the people's republic of Vermont, running for president. Why is it you people are so far out of the mainstream of Democratic candidates?

FARRELL: I've also given a contribution to John Kerry. Is that OK? A war hero?

NOVAK: Mike, do you think that the president of the United States ought to be ashamed of the new Dixie Chicks?

FARRELL: Well, I'm not sure who the president of the United States is or ought to be, but the Dixie chicks are citizens of the United States, Bob. They don't check in their citizenship when they become celebrities.

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