May 2, 2007

In Case You've Forgotten...

Four years ago... Maureen Dowd, Bush Cumslut Extrodinaire.

Maureen Dowd, column, May 4

The tail hook caught the last cable, jerking the fighter jet from 150 m.p.h. to zero in two seconds. Out bounded the cocky, rule-breaking, daredevil flyboy, a man navigating the Highway to the Danger Zone, out along the edges where he was born to be, the further on the edge, the hotter the intensity.

He flashed that famous all-American grin as he swaggered around the deck of the aircraft carrier in his olive flight suit, ejection harness between his legs, helmet tucked under his arm, awestruck crew crowding around. Maverick was back, cooler and hotter than ever, throttling to the max with joystick politics.

Compared to Karl Rove's ''revvin' up your engine'' myth-making cinematic style, Jerry Bruckheimer's movies look like ''Lizzie McGuire.''

This time Maverick didn't just nail a few bogeys and do a 4G inverted dive with a MIG-28 at a range of two meters. This time the Top Gun wasted a couple of nasty regimes, and promised this was just the beginning.
She apparently was able to type that with one hand...

Thomas Friedman, The World's Smartest Moron:
President Bush may have declared the war in Iraq effectively over. But, judging from my own e-mail box -- where conservative readers are bombing me for not applauding enough the liberation of Iraq, and liberals for selling out to George Bush -- the war over the war still burns on here.

Conservatives now want to use the victory in Iraq to defeat all liberal ideas at home, and to make this war a model for America's relations with the world, while liberals -- fearing all that -- are still quietly rooting for Mr. Bush to fail.
Fuck off, Tom.

And let us listen to the wise words of the Boy King himself.
"The liberation of Iraq is a crucial advance in the campaign against terror. We have removed an ally of Al Qaeda, and cut off a source of terrorist funding.

"And this much is certain: No terrorist network will gain weapons of mass destruction from the Iraqi regime, because that regime is no more.

"In these 19 months that changed the world, our actions have been focused, and deliberate, and proportionate to the offense. We have not forgotten the victims of September 11th -- the last phone calls, the cold murder of children, the searches in the rubble. With those attacks, the terrorists and their supporters declared war on the United States. And war is what they got."
You will go down as one of the most spectacular examples of failure in American history, George*.


*click through to my site for the extended version--unlike my blog, people actually read Maru, so I have to have some boundaries, I suppose. You know, it's like being a houseguest. Yeah, sure, your friend who owns the place can walk around with her shoes on and leave big messes everywhere...but it just don't feel right for you to be doin' it, too? Knowi'msayin?

UPDATE: Upon further review, it was a mistake to call Ms. Dowd a cumslut. She can be a hack and a shill at times, but apparently this was not one of them. Sorry dear WTFer's. Sorry, Ms. Dowd.


Anonymous said...

Shame on you! Check your sources! Maureen Dowd was NOT pandering to W in her article of May 4, 2003. She was being sarcastic! Later in that same article you quote, the Iceman character tells Maverick (G. W. Bush) the following:

"Your ego's writing checks your body can't cash. You didn't need to take all that water survival training in the White House swimming pool. The Abraham Lincoln was practically docked, only 30 miles off shore, after 10 months at sea. They had to steer it away from land for you. If you'd waited a few hours, you could've just walked aboard. You and Rove are making a gorgeous campaign video on the Pacific to cast you as the warrior president for 2004, but back on shore, things are ugly. The California economy's bleeding, even worse than other states'. When you took office, the unemployment rate in San Jose was 1.7 percent; by February of this year, it had risen to 8.5 percent. Your motorcade didn't bother to stop in the depressed high-tech corridor in Silicon Valley. Every time you cut taxes and raise deficits while you're roaring ahead with a pre-emptive military policy, you're unsafe. National unemployment goes up to 6 percent and you just hammer Congress to pass your tax cut. The only guys sure about their jobs these days are defense contractors connected to Republicans and the Carlyle Group, which owns half of the defense plant you visited here. You're dangerous."

You owe Ms. Dowd a HUGE apology! And your readers, too! And Maru, whose faithful readers (like me) count on her to provide truth and insight. Shame!

JasonC said...

Ok, ok, calm down. If I was misled by the article at E&P, I apologize. I cannot find an original copy--if you've got a link that'd be great.

I guess I'm still venting at her for her John Edwards Haircut smear.

Anonymous said...

"No terrorist network will gain weapons of mass destruction from the Iraqi regime, because that regime is no more...."

Oh, I thought it was because they didnt have any to begin with. Shows you how much I know. I probably should get some implants....

Anonymous said...

OK, Jason, here is the link:
I think you have to be a subscriber to TIMES SELECT in order to open it. And I agree that E&P made the gaffe, and your error may have been trusting them. Still, I suggest checking the original sources. I have read enough of M. Dowd to suspect that the quote was taken out of context. She bashes W and the other administration slime on a regular basis.

Anonymous said...

Whew! I thought you were apologizing for the word itself. But yeah, carlpop--though perhaps a little too familiar with the works of a shallow, overrated twit--had you dead to rights.

Friedman, on the other hand, shoots a wad of W-spooge every time he sneezes.